Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the AuthorHentz, Caroline Lee
General
Ernest Linwood; or, The Inner Life of the Author
Hentz, Caroline Lee
Fiction
So he kept talking, soothingly, kindly, keeping me out in the balminess
and freshness of the evening, while the fever atmosphere burned within.
I knew not how long I sat. I knew not when I returned to the house. I
have forgotten that. But I remember standing that night over a still,
immovable form, on whose pale, peaceful brow, those purplish spots, of
which I had heard in awful whispers, were distinctly visible. The
tossing arms were crossed reposingly over the pulseless bosom,--the
restless limbs were rigid as stone. I remember seeing my mother, whom
they tried to lead into another chamber,--my mother, usually so calm and
placid,--throw herself wildly on that humble, fever-blasted form, and
cling to it in an agony of despair. It was only by the exertion of main
force that she was separated from it and carried to her own apartment.
There she fell into one of those deadly fainting fits, from which the
faithful, affectionate Peggy had so often brought her back to life.
Never shall I forget that awful night. The cold presence of mortality in
its most appalling form, the shadow of my mother's doom that was rolling
heavily down upon me with prophetic darkness, the dismal preparations,
the hurrying steps echoing so drearily through the midnight gloom; the
cold burden of life, the mystery of death, the omnipotence of God, the
unfathomableness of Eternity,--all pressed upon me with such a crushing
weight, my spirit gasped and fainted beneath the burden.
One moment it seemed that worlds would not tempt me to look again on
that shrouded form, so majestic in its dread immobility,--its cold, icy
calmness,--then drawn by an awful fascination, I would gaze and gaze as
if my straining eyes could penetrate the depths of that abyss, which no
sounding line has ever reached.
I saw her laid in her lowly grave. My mother, too, was there. Dr.
Harlowe did every thing but command her to remain at home, but she would
not stay behind.
"I would follow her to her last home," said she, "if I had to walk
barefoot over a path of thorns."
Only one sun rose on her unburied form,--its setting rays fell on a
mound of freshly heaved sods, where a little while before was a mournful
cavity.
Mrs. Linwood sent her beautiful carriage to take us to the churchyard.
Slowly it rolled along behind the shadow of the dark, flapping pall.
Very few beside ourselves were present, so great a panic pervaded the
community; and very humble was the position Peggy occupied in the world.
People wondered at the greatness of our grief, for she was _only_ a
servant. They did not know all that she was to us,--how could they? Even
I dreamed not then of the magnitude of our obligations.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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