Our impatience is thus sharply rebuked. Bashfulness and apathy are a
tough husk in which a delicate organization is protected from premature
ripening. It would be lost if it knew itself before any of the best
souls were yet ripe enough to know and own it. Respect the
_naturlangsamkeit_ which hardens the ruby in a million years, and works
in duration in which Alps and Andes come and go as rainbows. The good
spirit of our life has no heaven which is the price of rashness. Love,
which is the essence of God, is not for levity, but for the total worth
of man. Let us not have this childish luxury in our regards, but the
austerest worth; let us approach our friend with an audacious trust in
the truth of his heart, in the breadth, impossible to be overturned, of
his foundations.
The attractions of this subject are not to be resisted, and I leave,
for the time, all account of subordinate social benefit, to speak of
that select and sacred relation which is a kind of absolute, and which
even leaves the language of love suspicious and common, so much is this
purer, and nothing is so much divine.
I do not wish to treat friendships daintily, but with roughest courage.
When they are real, they are not glass threads or frostwork, but the
solidest thing we know. For now, after so many ages of experience, what
do we know of nature or of ourselves? Not one step has man taken toward
the solution of the problem of his destiny. In one condemnation of
folly stand the whole universe of men. But the sweet sincerity of joy
and peace which I draw from this alliance with my brother’s soul is the
nut itself whereof all nature and all thought is but the husk and
shell. Happy is the house that shelters a friend! It might well be
built, like a festal bower or arch, to entertain him a single day.
Happier, if he know the solemnity of that relation and honor its law!
He who offers himself a candidate for that covenant comes up, like an
Olympian, to the great games where the first-born of the world are the
competitors. He proposes himself for contests where Time, Want, Danger,
are in the lists, and he alone is victor who has truth enough in his
constitution to preserve the delicacy of his beauty from the wear and
tear of all these. The gifts of fortune may be present or absent, but
all the speed in that contest depends on intrinsic nobleness and the
contempt of trifles. There are two elements that go to the composition
of friendship, each so sovereign that I can detect no superiority in
either, no reason why either should be first named. One is truth. A
friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think
aloud. I am arrived at last in the presence of a man so real and equal
that I may drop even those undermost garments of dissimulation,
courtesy, and second thought, which men never put off, and may deal
with him with the simplicity and wholeness with which one chemical atom
meets another. Sincerity is the luxury allowed, like diadems and
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