English fiction -- 19th century; Tailors -- Fiction
The door closed upon Evan, and waiting at the foot, of the stairs a
minute to hear how he was received, Mrs. Mel went to the kitchen and
called the name of Dandy, which brought out an ill-built, low-browed,
small man, in a baggy suit of black, who hopped up to her with a surly
salute. Dandy was a bird Mrs. Mel had herself brought down, and she had
for him something of a sportsman’s regard for his victim. Dandy was the
cleaner of boots and runner of errands in the household of Melchisedec,
having originally entered it on a dark night by the cellar. Mrs. Mel,
on that occasion, was sleeping in her dressing-gown, to be ready to
give the gallant night-hawk, her husband, the service he might require
on his return to the nest. Hearing a suspicious noise below, she rose,
and deliberately loaded a pair of horse-pistols, weapons Mel had worn
in his holsters in the heroic days gone; and with these she stepped
downstairs straight to the cellar, carrying a lantern at her girdle.
She could not only load, but present and fire. Dandy was foremost in
stating that she called him forth steadily, three times, before the
pistol was discharged. He admitted that he was frightened, and
incapable of speech, at the apparition of the tall, terrific woman.
After the third time of asking he had the ball lodged in his leg and
fell. Mrs. Mel was in the habit of bearing heavier weights than Dandy.
She made no ado about lugging him to a chamber, where, with her own
hands (for this woman had some slight knowledge of surgery, and was
great in herbs and drugs) she dressed his wound, and put him to bed;
crying contempt (ever present in Dandy’s memory) at such a poor
creature undertaking the work of housebreaker. Taught that he really
was a poor creature for the work, Dandy, his nursing over, begged to be
allowed to stop and wait on Mrs. Mel; and she who had, like many strong
natures, a share of pity for the objects she despised, did not cast him
out. A jerk in his gait, owing to the bit of lead Mrs. Mel had dropped
into him, and a little, perhaps, to her self-satisfied essay in
surgical science on his person, earned him the name he went by.
When her neighbours remonstrated with her for housing a reprobate, Mrs.
Mel would say: “Dandy is well-fed and well-physicked: there’s no harm
in Dandy”; by which she may have meant that the food won his gratitude,
and the physic reduced his humours. She had observed human nature. At
any rate, Dandy was her creature; and the great Mel himself rallied her
about her squire.
“When were you drunk last?” was Mrs. Mel’s address to Dandy, as he
stood waiting for orders.
He replied to it in an altogether injured way:
“There, now; you’ve been and called me away from my dinner to ask me
that. Why, when I had the last chance, to be sure.”
“And you were at dinner in your new black suit?”
“Well,” growled Dandy, “I borrowed Sally’s apron. Seems I can’t please
ye.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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