I didn't notice that last much till I got into the drugstore. Then I
thought I was going to suffocate, and I had a kind of squeezing
upside-down feeling in my stomach and diaphragm and throat, which I
didn't realize till later was what they meant by "being sick." I stood
over the directory rack, pretending to read, but really just
struggling with my insides, and a man came along and shouted in my ear
something that sounded like, "Vvvm trubbb lll-lll-lll ay-dee?" (I
didn't get that sorted out for hours afterwards, but I don't think
I'll ever forget just the way it sounded at the time. Of course, he
meant, "Having trouble, little lady?") But all I knew at the time was
he was too big and smelled of all kinds of things that were unfamiliar
and slightly sickening. I couldn't answer him. All I could do was turn
away so as not to breathe him, and try to pretend I knew what I was
doing with the directory. Then he hissed at me ("Sorry, no offense," I
figured out later), and said clearly enough so I could understand even
then, "Just trying to help," and walked away.
As soon as he was gone, I walked out myself. Directory or no
directory, I had to get out of that store. I went back to where I'd
left the car, but instead of getting in it, I sat down on a bench in
the park, and waited till the turmoil inside me began to quiet down.
I went back into that drugstore once before I left, purposely, just to
see if I could pin down what it was that had bothered me so much,
because I never reacted that strongly afterwards, and I wondered if
maybe it was just that it was the first time I was inside one of their
buildings. But it was more than that; that place was a regular
snake-pit of a treatment for a stranger, believe me! They had a
tobacco counter, and a lunch counter and a perfume-and-toiletries
section, and a nut-roasting machine, and just to top it off, in the
back of the store, an open-to-look-at (_and_ smell) pharmaceutical
center! Everything, all mixed together, and compounded with stale
human sweat, which was also new to me at the time. And no air
conditioning.
Most of the air conditioning they have is bad enough on its own, with
chemical smells, but those are comparatively easy to get used to ...
and I'll take them _any_ time, over what I got in that first dose of
_Odeur d'Earth_.
* * * * *
Anyhow, I sat on the park bench about fifteen minutes, I guess,
letting the sun and fresh air seep in, and trying to tabulate and
memorize as many of the components of that drugstore smell as I could,
for future reference. I was simply going to have to adjust to them,
and next time I wanted to be prepared.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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