Fair play : $b a novelSouthworth, Emma Dorothy Eliza Nevitte
General
Fair play : $b a novel
Southworth, Emma Dorothy Eliza Nevitte
American fiction -- 19th century
“Justin! Justin! My lover! My beloved! Where are you? Where are you in
all space? Are you near me? Can you hear me? Oh, is there no way of
piercing the veil? of getting to you, or drawing you to me? Oh, come to
me! Oh, hear me! I am telling you what no power could have ever drawn
from my lips, Justin, while you were in the flesh! Justin! I am telling
you how I loved you! How I loved you! I meant to have died with you on
the wreck! I did, Justin! I did, though I would not confess I loved you!
I meant to have died with you! Oh, why did you not let me? I cannot,
cannot outlive you! Once you said, though you loved me so much, you
could live without me, because you were so strong to suffer! But I! oh,
now I know that I am not strong. I cannot live without you! and with the
memory of my bitter unkindness to you! Justin! Justin! Oh, spirit!
wherever you live in boundless space, speak to my spirit!”
She was indeed almost insane in her frenzy of grief, remorse and
despair. And but for her deep religious principles, in her fierce
anguish she would have run down through the darkness and cast herself
headlong into the sea, that she still heard thundering upon the beach.
At last, exhausted by mental and physical trials, she sank down upon the
ground and covered her face with her hands, and sat there in mute
despair during the remaining dark hours of the night.
Day dawned in that strange place at last.
She lifted up her bowed head and looked around, feeling in the midst of
all her misery the same sort of weird curiosity that causes a criminal
on his way to the scaffold to look with attention at every object of
interest in the range of his vision.
She saw the eastern horizon growing red behind a grove of tall, dark
trees, but what sort of trees they were she could not tell. She arose to
her feet and stretched her chilled and benumbed limbs and took off her
life-preserver. Her clothing had dried upon her, but it had a harsh
feeling and a stiff set and a scent of the sea water. Her hair, too, was
loose and flowing; combs and pins had been lost in her recent battle
with the waves. But she cared little for all these circumstances. A
feverish thirst consumed her and she walked on in search of some spring
or stream of fresh water.
Day broadened over the unknown land, showing her an undulating and
variegated country of hill and valley, plain and forest. The ground was
covered with a coarse, rank verdure, and starred with many strange wild
flowers. She merely glanced at these as she rambled inland in quest of a
fountain to quench her burning thirst.
She walked some distance, fearless and careless of what unknown wild
beasts or wilder men might intercept her progress and destroy her life.
She often sank exhausted on the ground; and arose and recommenced her
journey, driven onward by the fiery thirst that seemed to scorch up her
very lifeblood.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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