"I tell you candidly," he says, with reckless emphasis, "I should have
been false to one or other of you, and it certainly would not have
been to you."
"You malign yourself," she says, looking at him with steadfast love.
"Do I? What a fool you are!" he says, roughly. "Well, by your own mad
folly you have separated us irretrievably. Blame yourself for this,
not me. My affairs are so hopelessly entangled that I must quit the
country without delay. Your own mad act has rolled an ocean between
us."
He turns, and goes towards the door. Wild with grief and despair, she
follows him, and lays a detaining hand upon his arm.
"Not like this, Horace!" she whispers, desperately. "Do not leave me
like this. Have pity. You shall not go like this! Be merciful: you are
my all!"
"Stand out of my way," he says, between his teeth: and then, as she
still clings to him in her agony, he raises his hand and deliberately
strikes her. Not violently, not severely, but still with sufficient
force to make her stagger backwards and catch hold of a chair to keep
her from falling.
He is gone: and she, stunned, quivering, half blind with nervous
horror, still stands by the chair and tries to realize all that has
passed. As she draws a deep breath, she places her hand, with a
spasmodic movement, to her left side, as though to quell some darting
pain that lies there. The action brings back consciousness, and that
saddest of all things, memory.
"He did not mean it," she whispers to herself, with white set lips.
"It was not a blow; it was only that he wished to put me to one side,
and I was in his way, no doubt: I angered him by my persistency.
Darling! How could I think that he would hurt me?"
Languid, heart-broken, she creeps to her bed, and, flinging herself
upon it, dressed as she is, sleeps heavily until the morn, "diffusing
round a trembling flood of light," wakes her to grief once more.
CHAPTER XXXVI.
"Have mind that eild aye follows youth;
Death follows life with gaping mouth;
Sen erdly joy abidis never,
Work for the joy that lastis ever;
For other joy is all but vain,
And erdly joy returns in pain."--W. DUNBAR.
Something within her knows he will return. Yet all the next day long
she sits in terrible suspense, not being certain of the end. Towards
noon he comes, sullen, disdainful, and dark with depression.
He sinks into a chair, looking tired and careworn.
"You have over-fatigued yourself?" she says, gently, going over to him
and touching his hand lightly.
"No. I have been to Pullingham again and back; that is all."
"There again?" she says. "And you saw----?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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