Fan : The Story of a Young Girl's LifeHudson, W. H. (William Henry)
General
Fan : The Story of a Young Girl's Life
Hudson, W. H. (William Henry)
Fiction
“So you imagine, but I can see further. Do you know, Fan, that you
cannot give your heart to two persons; that if you give your whole heart
to this lady you think so beautiful and so kind, and who will be paid
for her kindness, that her gain will be my loss?”
Fan, full of strange trouble, put her trembling hand on the other's
hand. “Tell me how it will be your loss, Mary,” she said. “I don't think
I understand.”
“I was everything to you before, Fan. I don't want a divided affection,
and I shall not share your affection with this woman, however beautiful
and kind she may be; or, rather, I shall not be satisfied with what
is over after you have begun to worship her. Your love is a kind of
worship, Fan, and you cannot possibly have that feeling for more than
one person, although you will find it easy enough to transfer it from
one to another. If you do not quite understand me yet, you must think it
over and try to find out what I mean. But I warn you, Fan, that if ever
you transfer the affection you have felt for me to this woman, or this
girl, then you shall cease to be anything to me. You shall be no more to
me than you were before I first saw you and felt a strange wish to take
you to my heart; when you were in rags and half-starved, and without one
friend in the world.”
The tears started to the girl's eyes, and she threw her arms round the
other's neck. “Oh, Mary, nothing, nothing will ever make me love you
less! Will you not believe me, Mary?”
“Yes, dear Fan, don't cry. Good-bye, my darling. Write to me at least
once every fortnight, and when you want money or anything let me know,
and you shall have it. And when May comes round again let me see you
unchanged in heart, but with an improved mind and a little colour in
your dear pale face.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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