Fancies Versus FadsChesterton, G. K. (Gilbert Keith)
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Fancies Versus Fads
Chesterton, G. K. (Gilbert Keith)
English essays -- 20th century
There was a curious case of the same thing in the attempt to economize
food during the Great War. The reformers did not wish _really_ to
economize food; the great food profiteers would not let them. The fussy
person wants to force or forbid something, under the conditions defining
all such effort; it must be something that will interfere with the
citizen and will not interfere with the profiteer. Given such a problem,
we might almost predict, for instance, that he will propose the
limitation of the number of courses at a restaurant. It will not save
the beef; it is not meant to save the beef; but to save the
beef-merchant. There will actually be more food bought, if the cook is
not allowed to turn the scraps into kickshaws. But why should a
plutocracy including food profiteers object to more food being bought?
Why, for that matter, should the pure-minded social idealist object to
more food being bought, as long as it is the wrong food that is sold?
His quite disinterested aim is not that food should be restricted, but
merely that freedom should be restricted. When once he is assured that
a sufficient number of thoughtless persons are really getting what they
don’t want, he says he is building Jerusalem in England’s green and
pleasant land. And so he is; if the expression signifies handing over
England to the wealthier Jews.
Now the only way in which this conclusive explanation can be countered
is by ridiculing, as impossible, the notion that so fantastic a compact
can be clearly and coolly made. And of course it is not so made. The two
attitudes are not logically interlocked, like the antlers of stags; they
simply squeeze each other out of shape, as in a wrestle of two rival
jelly-fish. We should be far safer if they had the intellectual honesty
of a bargain or a bribe. As it is, they have an almost creepy quality
which justifies the comparison to shapeless beasts of the sea. I defy
any rational man to deny that he has noticed something moonstruck and
mis-shapen, as apart from anything unjust or uncomfortable, about the
little laws which have lately been tripping him up; laws which may tell
him at any minute that he must not purchase turpentine before a certain
tick of the clock, or that if he buys a pound of tea he must also buy a
pennyworth of tin-tacks. The strictly correct word for such things is
half-witted; and they are half-witted because each of the two
incongruous partners has only half his will. They have not, for
instance, the sweeping simplicity of the old sumptuary laws or even the
old Puritan persecutions. But they are also half-witted because even the
one mind is not the whole mind; it is largely the subconscious mind,
which dares not trust itself in speech. The Drink Capitalist dares not
actually say to the teetotaller, “Let me sell a quart bottle of whisky
to be drunk in a day, and then I will let you pester a poor fellow who
makes a pot of beer last half an hour.” That is exactly what happens in
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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