Leaning upon his rake, the Peasant returned the salutation with a nod, but said nothing. "My friend," said the Office Seeker, "you see before you the wreck of an ambitious man--ruined by the pursuit of place and power. This morning when I set out from the national capital--" "Stranger," the Peasant interrupted, "if you're going back there soon maybe you wouldn't mind using your influence to make me Postmaster at Smith's Corners." The traveller passed on. The Various Delegation The King of Wideout having been offered the sovereignty of Wayoff, sent for the Three Persons who had made the offer, and said to them: "I am extremely obliged to you, but before accepting so great a responsibility I must ascertain the sentiments of the people of Wayoff." "Sire," said the Spokesman of the Three Persons, "they stand before you." "Indeed!" said the King; "are you, then, the people of Wayoff?" "Yes, your Majesty." "There are not many of you," the King said, attentively regarding them with the royal eye, "and you are not so very large; I hardly think you are a quorum. Moreover, I never heard of you until you came here; whereas Wayoff is noted for the quality of its pork and contains hogs of distinction. I shall send a Commissioner to ascertain the sentiments of the hogs." The Three Persons, bowing profoundly, backed out of the presence; but soon afterward they desired another audience, and, on being readmitted, said, through their Spokesman: "May it please your Majesty, we are the hogs." The No Case A Statesman who had been indicted by an unfeeling Grand Jury was arrested by a Sheriff and thrown into jail. As this was abhorrent to his fine spiritual nature, he sent for the District Attorney and asked that the case against him be dismissed. "Upon what grounds?" asked the District Attorney. "Lack of evidence to convict," replied the accused. "Do you happen to have the lack with you?" the official asked. "I should like to see it." "With pleasure," said the other; "here it is." So saying he handed the other a check, which the District Attorney carefully examined, and then pronounced it the most complete absence of both proof and presumption that he had ever seen. He said it would acquit the oldest man in the world. A Harmless Visitor At a meeting of the Golden League of Mystery a Woman was discovered, writing in a note-book. A member directed the attention of the Superb High Chairman to her, and she was asked to explain her presence there, and what she was doing. "I came in for my own pleasure and instruction," she said, "and was so struck by the wisdom of the speakers that I could not help making a few notes." "Madam," said the Superb High Chairman, "we have no objection to visitors if they will pledge themselves not to publish anything they hear. Are you--on your honour as a lady, now, madam--are you not connected with some newspaper?"