Boarding schools -- England -- Fiction; Boys -- Fiction; Schools -- Fiction; Social classes -- England -- Fiction
The fellows went into chapel there in droves under gowned and hooded
shepherds. Jan so timed matters as to enter in the wake of the last lot,
but well before the appearance of Mr. Thrale and his chaplain. Not being
in the choir, his place in chapel, where the seats were allotted on a
principle unknown to the boys, was mercifully unexalted, and he reached
it with no worse sign or portent than the raised eyebrows and whispered
welcome of his immediate neighbours. A congregation of four hundred
persons absorbs even a Captain of Cricket more effectually than he
thinks. And a voluntary, bright and exhilarating as all the music in
that chapel, gave him heart and hope until the arrival of the
officiating pair afforded an ineffable sense of security and relief.
Jan stood up with the rest, not quite at his full height, yet with his
eyes turned in sheer fascination towards the little old Head Master. He
looked very pale and stern, but his eyes could not have been fixed more
steadfastly in front of him if he himself had been marching to his doom.
In his left hand he held something that Jan was glad to see; it was dear
old Jerry’s purple and embroidered sermon-case, a gift no doubt, and yet
almost an incongruous vanity in that uncompromising hand.
Jan sank down and breathed his thanks for the last mercy of this
service, for his perhaps undeserved escape from open humiliation and
public shame. It was not to be seen through his forcible composure, but
the glow of momentary victory filled every cell of a heart which the
bells had first expanded. And he had never joined in the quick and
swinging psalms with a zest more grateful to himself or so distressing
to one or two of his hypercritical neighbours; there could not have been
much wrong with Rutter, either physically or morally, these opined; or
else he had been let off, and was already wallowing in an indecent odour
of sanctity.
Wallowing he was, but for once only in the present, without dwelling on
old days or on the wrath already come. This was not the house of wrath,
but of brightness and light; he was not going to darken it for the last
time with cheap memories and easy phantoms. Any fool could think of his
first Sunday, and recall his first impressions of chapel; it was rather
Jan’s desire so to receive his last impression as to have something
really worth recalling all the days of his life; but even that was a
vague and secondary consideration, whereas the present recompense was
certain, vivid, and acute.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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