AMERICAN. Well, your child costs nothing--my dog costs eight dollars. Think that over--is your son a thoroughbred? My dog is of the purest breed--think that over--if your son hurts my dog I'll hold you responsible. Think that over. [_Fills his glass._] COCOTTE. What do you think that man to be, little mouse? YOUNG MAN. A full blooded American. ARTIST. I should say he's a German who has spent two weeks in New York. TOWNSMAN. Aristide, are you going to sit there and permit your defenseless wife to be insulted like that? TOWNSMAN. As long as you have your tongue, my dear, you are not defenseless. TOWNSWOMAN. It is your business to talk to him. [_Kisses the Child._] My poor little Phillip! Your father is no man. TOWNSMAN. I was before I got married. [_Crosses to the American._] Sir, my name is Aristide Beaurepard. AMERICAN. Is that my fault? TOWNSMAN. I am the father of a family. AMERICAN. I am very sorry for you, indeed. TOWNSMAN. I have a wife and children-- AMERICAN. You have only yourself to blame. TOWNSMAN. Your dog-- AMERICAN. I have no desire to discuss dogs with you. I don't believe you know anything about thoroughbred dogs. Waiter, sit this man down in his place. TOWNSMAN. This is I must say, this is-- WAITER. Monsieur, you must not make a racket around you. This is a first class establishment. A real prince once dined here, I would have you understand. Come on now, if you please. [_Leads Townsman back to his seat._] TOWNSMAN [_sits unwillingly_]. Not a centime tip will that fellow get from me. Not a centime. AMERICAN. Waiter, Waiter, bring my dog a portion of liver, and not too fat. And a roast potato. BEGGAR. [_Coming down C._] [_Jumps up, cries out wildly._] I can't stand any more. For eight days I have not had a warm morsel of food in my stomach. I am not a human being any more. I'll kill myself. [_Runs to the edge of the dock and jumps overboard._] [_The splash of the water is heard. The Townswoman and the Waiter call "help, help!" Whereupon, from every side a crowd collects so that the entire background is filled with people staring into the water._] TOWNSWOMAN. For God's sake he has thrown himself into the Seine. Oh, God! Oh, God! OMNES. He's in the river! AMERICAN. [_At table Right._] What a noisy place this is. [_Townsman at center throws off his coat and is unbuttoning his vest when his wife seizes him._] TOWNSWOMAN. [_Center._] [_Whimpering._] Aristide, remember you have a wife and children. TOWNSMAN. That is why I want to do it. TOWNSWOMAN. Aristide, I'll jump in after you--as true as I live I'll jump in after you. TOWNSMAN. [_Slowly puts his coat on again._] Then I won't do it. [_Goes with her into the crowd._] A VOICE. Get the life buoy. [_Willing hands try to unloosen the life buoy, but it sticks._] ANOTHER VOICE. Let that life buoy alone. Don't you see the sign "Do not touch"? A MAN. The buoy is no good. It will not work. ANOTHER MAN. Of course not. It's city property.