First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
General
First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3
Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
Fiction
As she took his offered arm, she was certain she felt him shudder; but as
her own trembled at the time, she afterwards thought she might have been
mistaken.
They walked up the room in silence. Confused, and pained, Julia found
that she could not congratulate her companion on his good fortune
with the cordial frankness which had else been natural, nor ask half
the obvious questions, respecting circumstances so hastily explained,
and which had brought about, thus suddenly, a state of things, that
altogether appeared to her bewildered apprehension, more like a dream,
than a reality. Oh how delightedly would she have dwelt, she thought, a
short time since on such a subject, so full of wonder, and, which ought
to be, so full of joy.
But something extraordinary, something more than sorrow in the manner of
this incomprehensible being, whom she must now too, call by the new,
and not yet endeared name of Fitz-Ullin, seemed to have raised up an
insuperable barrier between them. Even the expression of his countenance,
(though still she beheld the features of Edmund) was, in all that
regarded mind, or indicated feeling, utterly changed.
His presence inspired her with an almost superstitious awe! He was so
like, and yet so unlike himself, that she traced the resemblance, with
feelings not far removed from those with which the identity of a visitant
from the grave might be recognised. And strange it is, that such identity
should appal, while it portrays what, in life, would have claimed our
fondest embrace.
He was indeed evidently miserable; and that idea, awakened every habitual
feeling of tenderness in Julia’s breast. The thought of, why he was thus
unhappy, came next in the train of reflections, and, as it presented
itself in the unwelcome form of his love for another, she unconsciously
suffered a sigh to be audible.
Fitz-Ullin looked suddenly round; her eyes were bent downwards; and
now, for the first time since he entered the room, he permitted his
to dwell, for a few seconds, on that perfect loveliness which he had
never contemplated, even in imagination, without a bewildering sense of
delight, which rendered the lapse of time imperceptible. Julia felt his
silent gaze, though she saw it not, and a thrill of pleasure accompanied
the consciousness; for which weakness, however, she instantly condemned
herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account