First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
General
First Love: A Novel. Vol. 3 of 3
Loudon, Mrs. (Margracia)
Fiction
“At least, I should suppose I am right?” he continued, in a questioning
tone. “If so—if,” Julia at length seemed to consider some little
manifestation of spirit necessary. “Most people,” she faltered out,
“would be offended at having their sentiments thus taken for granted; but
you think, I suppose, that our long intimacy authorizes you to act as you
please.”
“As I please!” repeated Fitz-Ullin, “most assuredly not as I please,
but as you please. It may be, and certainly is in my power, and indeed
I feel myself called upon, while you are in this ship, not to permit
Lord Surrel, or any officer of mine, to make his attentions troublesome
to you, in a situation where you can neither avoid his society, nor
enjoy the protection of your natural friends; but, to control the
inclinations of Lady Julia L⸺,” he added, (and with some bitterness) “is
an undertaking to which I have not the boldness to aspire!”
Fortunately for Julia the stunning effects of the new and heart-chilling
conviction supplied by this last speech, was so overpowering, that
it gave her somewhat the appearance of outward calm. So, it was Lord
Surrel’s attentions, Lord Surrel’s love, simply as troublesome to her,
not as interfering with his own, of which he was speaking! Here, indeed,
was a revulsion of every feeling, too tremendous for Julia’s strength!
Her heart utterly ceased beating, her cheeks became as white and cold as
marble.
“Am I to understand then,” said Fitz-Ullin, surprised at her silence and
change of countenance, “that the attentions of Lord Surrel are agreeable
to you?”
Starting into momentary life, she exclaimed, hastily and eagerly, “Oh,
no!”
“Then I know how to act,” said Fitz-Ullin, as rising, and bowing with a
dignified and rather scornful air, he seemed about to leave the cabin;
when, pausing and returning a step or two, he stopped before her, and
added, in a suppressed tone, and with visible effort, “I was for a moment
apprehensive that my present interference was, perhaps, as unwelcome
as my unconscious intermeddling on another occasion. But, in that
particular at least, I trust you do me justice. I acted according to the
routine of duty. It was impossible for me to know—to suppose—that some
such step indeed was contemplated, I was partly aware; but of the when,
and the how, you must be conscious I could have no suspicion. You acquit
me then, I trust, of availing myself of a reposed confidence to play the
ruffian, and using the power entrusted to me for the public good, for
private and unjustifiable purposes?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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