be rude find plenty of opportunities for being so.
There is, I suppose, between the Persian and the European a difference
of opinion as to what constitutes puerility. One of the Governors of
Yezd once boasted to an English resident that it was no good trying to
hide things from him, as he knew what every European in the town had
for dinner. Then there is the custom of making absolutely worthless
presents with the most superb _empressement_. Once when I was in a big
village near Yezd with my wife and baby and mirza, a woman whom my wife
knew came in, and after greeting us presented us with four very crumpled
lettuce leaves, selecting the leaves according to her ideas of our exact
precedence with the utmost care and circumspection, and having in the
whole transaction very much the air of a maiden aunt giving a tip to
a schoolboy. Nor must it be supposed that these customs only obtain
amongst the women. A European banker once told me that if one of his
brokers gave him anything, the others always followed his example; and
that once at the bank one of them presented him with a rose-head, the
second at once plunged his hand into his pocket and produced an old
sweet, the third fumbled among his treasures, and at last found something
which looked like a lump of gum. He could not quite remember what the
fourth presentation was, but he fancied it was another sweet. Sometimes,
particularly in Parsi houses, presents of this sort will be elaborately
handed about, somewhat after the fashion of a round game, everybody
giving something to everybody, and finishing with exactly the same amount
as they had at the beginning. This game, however, is generally played
on a special occasion, and the presents of fruit and sprigs of myrtle
have a certain symbolical significance which gives grace and dignity to
the performance. Of course the interchange of presents which although
trifling have a positive value is one of the most striking features of
the social intercourse of Persia. This is a custom which needs to be
understood, and which soon degenerates into extravagance, but essentially
it is a good custom. A higher value is always placed on what are called
_saughāts_ or travellers’ presents, and Europeans either travelling or
residing in Persia should remember that a certain number of these will
be expected of them. When a Persian has done you a real civility, he
feels that to a certain extent he has introduced you to his home, and
any little European thing which you may give him he takes as a graceful
introduction to your separate life, and he values it from this point of
view much more than would be otherwise possible. The custom, however, has
its drawbacks; for it is the fashion in Persia always to present anything
which a visitor has admired, and this becomes a peculiarly hollow piece
of etiquette. Occasionally big Persians in dealing with inferiors use
this custom as a means of enriching themselves, but this of course is
exceptional.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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