Flatland: A Romance of Many DimensionsAbbott, Edwin Abbott
Science
Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions
Abbott, Edwin Abbott
Fourth dimension
Such a life, with all vision limited to a Point, and all motion to a
Straight Line, seemed to me inexpressibly dreary; and I was surprised to
note the vivacity and cheerfulness of the King. Wondering whether it was
possible, amid circumstances so unfavourable to domestic relations, to
enjoy the pleasures of conjugal union, I hesitated for some time to
question his Royal Highness on so delicate a subject; but at last I
plunged into it by abruptly inquiring as to the health of his family. “My
wives and children,” he replied, “are well and happy.”
Staggered at this answer—for in the immediate proximity of the Monarch
(as I had noted in my dream before I entered Lineland) there were none
but Men—I ventured to reply, “Pardon me, but I cannot imagine how your
Royal Highness can at any time either see or approach their Majesties,
when there are at least half a dozen intervening individuals, whom you
can neither see through, nor pass by? Is it possible that in Lineland
proximity is not necessary for marriage and for the generation of
children?”
“How can you ask so absurd a question?” replied the Monarch. “If it were
indeed as you suggest, the Universe would soon be depopulated. No, no;
neighbourhood is needless for the union of hearts; and the birth of
children is too important a matter to have been allowed to depend upon
such an accident as proximity. You cannot be ignorant of this. Yet since
you are pleased to affect ignorance, I will instruct you as if you were
the veriest baby in Lineland. Know, then, that marriages are consummated
by means of the faculty of sound and the sense of hearing.
“You are of course aware that every Man has two mouths or voices—as well
as two eyes—a bass at one and a tenor at the other of his extremities. I
should not mention this, but that I have been unable to distinguish your
tenor in the course of our conversation.” I replied that I had but one
voice, and that I had not been aware that His Royal Highness had two.
“That confirms my impression,” said the King, “that you are not a Man,
but a feminine Monstrosity with a bass voice and an utterly uneducated
ear. But to continue.
“Nature herself having ordained that every Man should wed two wives——”
“Why two?” asked I. “You carry your affected simplicity too far,” he
cried. “How can there be a completely harmonious union without the
combination of the Four in One, viz. the Bass and Tenor of the Man and
the Soprano and Contralto of the two Women?” “But supposing,” said I,
“that a man should prefer one wife or three?” “It is impossible,” he
said; “it is as inconceivable as that two and one should make five, or
that the human eye should see a Straight Line.” I would have interrupted
him; but he proceeded as follows:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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