Christian life -- Juvenile fiction; Pride and vanity -- Juvenile fiction; Self-deception -- Juvenile fiction
"I am afraid," said the young lady with a little sigh, "that I am most
like the seed among the thorns."
"Oh no, dear!" cried Flora, through whose mind the same reflection had
been passing during the greater part of the sermon.
"I am not always thoughtless," said Ada earnestly, "when I was a little
girl how I used to cry over the story of the Young Cottager, and wish
that I were like little Jane! and now often, on Sundays, when I hear a
beautiful sermon like that of this morning, I feel like a different
creature, really quite religious, and go to bed with such good
resolutions; but then comes the morrow, and somehow I forget all about
them till Sunday comes round again."
Flora was silent, for she knew not what to reply.
"You are so good, so unselfish, so unworldly--so altogether unlike me!"
"My dear Ada, you are a sad flatterer!"
"But every one thinks the same: your mother, the clergyman, all who
approach you see that you are an angel, only wanting the wings! When I
heard you repeating the confession of sins so fervently beside me, I
could not help saying to myself, I wonder what Flora has to confess;
how, by any stretch of imagination, she can believe herself to be a
’miserable sinner?’"
"Ada, we are all sinners."
"Ah yes; I know that there is plenty of wickedness in the world, but
then it is very unequally divided. Some have so little for their share
that it is actually invisible--like yours! Now what I wish you to tell
me is this, when you follow the clergyman in that part of the service,
are you confessing the sins of your neighbours in general, or any of
your own in particular?"
"You are jesting," said Flora, looking embarrassed.
"No indeed, I am not jesting, I am in very sober earnest. I want to
know with what you can possibly charge yourself when you pray for
forgiveness so devoutly."
"Do you wish the office of a father confessor?"
"Now, like a dear good child, just answer my question, or I shall think
that you do not because you cannot."
Flora hesitated;--strange to say, it was a subject on which she was
little accustomed to reflect. Through habit she had repeated prayers
aloud, and her voice had acquired an intonation which naturally gave an
impression of fervour; but she had never thought of questioning her own
heart as to the sincerity of her prayer, or the real existence of that
earnest devotion which was expressed in her manner. As little had she
dreamed of inquiring what particular sins lay on her conscience! the
truth is, that the burden, if she had any, was so light, that she could
scarcely be said to feel it. Ada, however, pressed for a reply; and
afraid that her cousin might suspect her of self-righteousness if she
remained silent, Flora, casting down her eyes, made answer--"I know that
I sometimes neglect my duties and put them off to a more convenient
time."
"What duties, may I ask?"
"Such as visiting the sick poor."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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