"I'm going to turn you both out," said Foe, getting up suddenly.
"Help yourself to another whisky-and-soda, Roddy. . . . I'm so beaten
with sleep it's odds against getting off my boots." As a fact, too,
his face was weary-white. He turned to Jimmy, however, with a ghost
of a smile. "Roddy has been talking a deal of nonsense. But if you
really care to inspect my little show, come around some morning
. . . . Let me see--to-day's Wednesday. Saturday is my slack
morning--What d'you say to breakfasting here on Saturday, nine
o'clock? and we'll walk over at half-past ten or thereabouts. I keep
a yellow dog there that will go through some tricks for you. . . .
Right? Then so long! . . . You can come along, too, Roddy, if you'll
behave yourself."
NIGHT THE FOURTH.
ADVENTURE OF THE POLICE STATION.
I opened my newspaper next morning in no little anxiety. I ought
rather to say "my newspapers": for the L.C.C. campaign was raging at
its height, and a candidate cannot afford to neglect in the morning
any nasty thing that any nasty fellow has written overnight.
Jephson--yes, he's the same good Jephson who wouldn't exchange my
button-stick for a Field-Marshal's baton--Jephson brought in my
morning tea and laid across the foot of my bed a bundle of newspapers
as thick as a bolster.
I sat up, reached for them and began to read almost as soon as he
switched on the light. I was honestly nervous.
I took the hostile papers first, of course. Pretty soon it began
to dawn on my grateful soul that all was right with the world.
The reporters had stood shoulder to shoulder. Two or three headlines
gave me a shake. "BRISK SCENES ACROSS THE WATER," "MR. FARRELL
SPEAKS OUT," "AN INTERRUPTER EJECTED." One headline in particular
gave me qualms--"WHAT'S WRONG WITH SILVERSMITH'S COLLEGE? PUBLIC
ENDOWMENT WITHOUT PUBLIC CONTROL: MR. FARRELL PUTS SOME SEARCHING
QUESTIONS." But it had all been toned down in the letterpress and
came to very little. The reporters, using their own discretion, had
used such phrases as "An interrupter, apparently labouring under some
excitement," "At this point a gentleman in the front row caused a
diversion by challenging . . . The audience were in no mood,
however, . . ." "Here an auditor protested warmly. It was
understood that he had some official connection with the institution
referred to by the candidate," and so on.
I hugged myself over my success. To be sure, the vague impression
derivable was that the "scene" had its origin in strong drink.
But the name of Professor John Foe nowhere appeared. Greatest
blessing of all, there was no leading article, no pithy paragraph,
even. I arose and shaved blithely. Across the stairhead I could
hear Jimmy shouting music-hall ditties--his custom in his bath.
Yes, all was right with the world.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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