Folk-Speech of Cumberland and Some Districts Adjacent: Being Short Stories and Rhymes in the Dialects of the West Border CountiesGibson, Alexander Craig
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Folk-Speech of Cumberland and Some Districts Adjacent: Being Short Stories and Rhymes in the Dialects of the West Border Counties
Gibson, Alexander Craig
English language -- Dialects -- England -- Cumberland -- Texts
“Show my feàce!” says I, “an’ what sùd I show than?” says I. “If it
cūms to showin’ feàces, I’ve a better feàce to show nor iver belang’t
to yan o’ your breed,” says I, “if t’ rest on them’s owte like t’
sample they’ve sent us; but if yé mūn know, I’s cūm’t of a stock ’at
niver wad be freetn’t to show a feàce till a king, let aleàn an oald
newdles wid a creùkt nwose, ’at co’s his-sel’ a jolly jist: an’ I defy
t’ feàce o’ clay,” says I, “to say ’at any on us iver dūd owte we need
shām on whoariver we show’t oor feàces. Dār’ to show my feàce, eh?”
says I, “my song! but this is a bonnie welcome to give a fellow ’at’s
cum’t sa far to see yé i’ seckan a mwornin!” I said a gay deal mair
o’ t’ seàm mak’, an’ o’ t’ while I was sayin’ on’t—or, I sūd say, o’ t’
while I was shootin’ on’t, for I dudn’t spar’ t’ noise—t’ oald divel
laid his-sel’ back iv his girt chair, an’ keept twiddlin’ his thooms
an’ glimin’ ūp at mé, wid a hoaf smūrk iv his feàce, as if he’d gitten
sum’at funny afooar him. Efter a while I stopt, for I’d ron me-sel’
varra nār oot o’ winnd, an’ I begon rayder to think shām o’ shootin’
an’ bellerin’ sooa at an oald man, an’ him as whisht as a troot throo
it o’; an’ when I’d poo’t in, he just said as whietly as iver, ’at I
was a natteral cur’osity. I dùdn’t ken weel what this meen’t, but I
thowte it was soace, an’ it hed like to set mé off ageàn, but I beàtt
it doon as weel as I cūd, an’ I said, “Hev yé gitten owte ageān mé?”
says I. “If yé hev, speak it oot like a man, an’ divn’t sit theear
twiddlin yer silly oald thooms an’ coa’in fwoke oot o’ ther neàms i’
that rwoad!” Than it o’ com oot plain aneuf. O’ this illnater was just
acoase I hedn’t brong him t’ steàns ’at he’d gedder’t on t’ fells that
het day, an’ he said ’at changin’ on them was ayder a varra dūrty trick
or a varra clumsy jwoke. “Trick!” says I. “Jwoke! dud yé say? It was
rayder past a jwoke to expect me to carry a leàd o’ brocken steàns
o’ t’ way here, when ther’ was plenty at t’ spot. I’s nūt sec a feùl as
ye’ve teàn me for.” He tok off his specks, an’ he glower’t at mé adoot
them; an’ than he pot them on ageàn, an’ glower’t at mé wid them; an’
than he laugh’t an’ ax’t mé if I thowte ther’ cud be nèa difference i’
steàns. “Whey,” says I, “ye’ll hardly hev t’ feàce to tell me ’at ya
bag o’ steàns isn’t as gud as anudder bag o’ steàns—an’ suer_lye_ to
man, ye’ll niver be sa consaitit as to say yé can break steàns better
nor oald Aberram ’at breaks them for his breid, an’ breaks them o’ day
lang, an’ ivery day?” Wid that he laugh’t agean an’ tel’t mé to sit
doon, an’ than ax’t me what I thowte meàd him tak so mickle trùble
laitin’ bits o’ stean on t’ fells if he cud git what he wantit at t’
rwoad side. “Well!” says I, “if I mun tell yé t’ truth, I thowte yé
war rayder nick’t i’ t’ heid; but it meàd nea matter what I thowte sa
lang as yé pait mé sa weel for gān wid yé.” As I said this, it com
into my held ’at it’s better to flaitch a feùl nor to feight wid him;
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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