"Raquel, do you really see how little the ideas of Don Rafael and his
mother agree? I know little enough--thanks to California, which keeps
its girls from education; but I do see that every thought of Rafael
Arteaga is for the new ways, the ways of the Americano."
The younger girl drew up her horse with a cruel jerk, and faced her
friend.
"Anita, beloved," she said, sadly, "you have said the thing I felt, but
did not know. Why not let some less dear one tell me?"
"Holy Maria! Who else would? You are going among strangers, but you are
no more a stranger to the California of to-day than is Dona Luisa. I
hope all the time some one tell you at San Diego, or at San Luis Rey,
but no one does; and Rafael does not meet us; and--"
"The letter did not reach him, or else he has gone by boat," said the
other, steadily. "Anita, why do you sometimes seem not quite friendly to
Rafael? Your words--"
"Never think it!" cried Ana. "We are friends enough, but--I know him
better than his mother--that is all! He has turned the heads of many
girls, but I do not think he has turned yours, Raquelita!"
The other girl made no reply.
"I do not think so," continued her friend, "because you have never once
lost sight of duty,--the duty Dona Luisa and the padre have taught you
to see. You are good, Raquel,--when you are not in a temper; but about
Rafael you do not think your own thoughts. You dream of the life of your
father and Dona Luisa when all this land was theirs. But the dream is
gone, and to-day we wake up."
"I see--the old world was too slow. You wake up to be all
Americano--no?"
"Raquel, do you hate them as much as Dona Luisa?"
The girl from Mexico turned her face toward the sea, and did not answer
at once. Then she said:
"Only once in my life have I spoken with an Americano, and I did not
hate him."
"A young man?"
"He--he was not old," she confessed.
"On my soul, I believe you have had a lover!" cried Ana. "Oho! you can
play Rafael at his own game, after all! Santa Maria! I thought you were
too pretty to be the saint they think you. Tell me!"
"There is not anything to tell," said the younger girl, quietly, though
the color crept to her cheek; and then after a little she added, "He
died. I never saw him but once; the padre said I was wrong to--to--oh,
they said things to me about heretics! I never knew any other, and I
promised not to. But if he had lived I should not have promised; that is
all."
"All! Rafael would think it enough! On my soul, I am glad you are so
human--though I have no love myself for heretics!"
"Human!" mused Raquel. "Is it human to remember, when one should forget
and cannot?"
She did not say it aloud, and refused to discuss the matter further.
"He is dead," she said; "Rafael cannot be jealous of a man I saw but
once; it was only the dream of a girl--like a picture in a book--and the
page is closed. I shall marry Rafael, and work in the world instead of
in the convent. It is for Mother Church and--it is right!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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