“But I knew him--and knew him jolly well too--when he was about twelve,
so that I really get a pull over the rest of you there, for it adds of
course immensely to the interest and if ever child was Father of the
Man, Peter was. You know how we both funked that marriage of his for
him--you because you knew Clare so well, I because I knew Peter. And
then for a time it really seemed that we were both entirely wrong.
Clare's is a far simpler personality than Peter's, and if you work along
one or two recognised lines--let her have her way, don't frighten her,
above all keep her conventional--it's all right. Clare was, and is,
awfully in love with him, and he madly with her of course--and that
helped everything along. You know how relieved we both were and indeed
it seemed, for a time, that it was going to be the making of both of
them--going to make Clare braver and Peter less morbid.
“Well, it's since you've been away that everything's happened. Although
the baby was born some weeks before you went, it's only lately that
Clare has been up and about. She's perfectly well and the baby's
splendid--promises to be a tremendous fellow and as healthy as possible.
You can imagine, a little, the effect of it all on Clare. I don't
suppose there's any girl in London been so wrapped in cotton wool all
her life, and that old ass of a father and still more irritating ass of
a mother would go on wrapping her still if they had their way. The
fuss they've both made about this whole business is simply
incredible--especially when the man's a doctor and brings Lord knows how
many children into the world every week of his life. But it's all been
awfully bad for Clare. Of course, she was frightened--frightened out of
her wits. It's the very first time life ever had its wrappings off for
her, and that in itself of course is a tremendously good thing. But you
can't, unfortunately, wrap any one up for all those years and then
take the wrappings off and not deliver a shock to the system. Of course
there's a shock, and it's just this shock that I'm so afraid of. I'm
afraid of it for one thing because Peter's so entirely oblivious of it.
He was in an agony of terror on the day that the baby was born, but once
it was there--well and healthy and promising--fear vanished. He could
only see room for glory--and glory he does. I cannot tell you what that
boy is like about the baby; at present he thinks, day and night, of
nothing else. It is the most terrific thing to watch his feeling about
it--and meanwhile he takes it for granted that Clare feels the same....
Well, she doesn't. I have been in a good deal during these last few days
and she's stranger than words can say--doesn't see the child if she can
help it--loves it, worships it, when it is there, and--is terrified of
it. I saw a look in her eyes when she was nursing it yesterday that was
sheer undiluted terror. She's been frightened out of her life, and if I
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