England, Northern -- Fiction; Fathers and sons -- Fiction; Jews -- Fiction
The character Philip now assumed was undoubtedly a composite affair.
Dandy Dave was predominant, but it was not immune from the vocabulary
and behaviour of pirates, explorers, trappers and other species of
emancipated men. The trapper element did not persist, as shall be
rendered credible.
"Do you see that skunk?" Captain Philip exclaimed to Lieutenant Barney
one day.
"Aye, aye, sir!" replied Lieutenant Barney, "Aye, aye, sir!" being, in
fact, Lieutenant Barney's only and final achievement in the diction of
romance.
The "skunk" was a notorious piebald cat even at that moment slinking
with a torso of fried fish along the yard wall of an empty house where
the "gang" was foregathered.
"'E must be captured! We shall sell 'is 'ide to the next ship wot
calls at yonder port!"
An exciting chase, which extended over two days, followed. On the
evening of the second day the corpse of the piebald cat was laid at
Captain Philip's feet.
"Wot now, Captain?" said Lieutenant Barney, whose wavering loyalties
had been steadied only an hour ago by the gift of an india-rubber
sucker. Philip's heart fluttered a little unquietly. In the mere
abstract conception of chase there had been much of the poetical. In
the presence of the dead cat the fogs of illusion thinned. Shame
tugged at his heart-strings. But the faultless figure of Dandy Dave
stood before him. With little knowledge of the implication of his
words, "Flay 'im!" he said harshly. "The merchants call this morn!"
Lieutenant Barney inserted a broken blade below the fringe of the cat's
eye. He tugged. Philip looked down. The hideous mess which ensued
spattered Philip's brain like a pat of filth. He ran quickly from the
yard and was violently sick for many minutes.... The trapper aspect of
Captain Philip's authority did not again assert itself.
Behind the Bridgeway Elementary School extended a huge and desolate
brick-croft. Here the "gang" frequently undertook expeditions to the
Himalayas and the two Poles. Volcanoes were discovered and duly
charted. Wide lakes of clayey yellow water were navigated. It was a
point of honour with the "gang" that the lakes must be definitely
crossed from border to border, not merely circumvented. But while the
"gang" miserably splashed along and drew their clogged boots to the
further side, Captain Philip serenely walked the whole way round and
from his dry vantage encouraged his men to safety. It would never do
for the Doomington counterpart of Dandy Dave to smirch his own limbs
alongside of the vulgar herd.
The last episode in the captaincy of Philip was the Liberation of
Princess Lena, the immediate inspiration of which was the gallant
rescue by Dandy Dave of the daughter of the President of the American
Republic from a cellar below the very basement of the White House.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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