France -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories
Then to put an end to the discussion, he introduced his cousin, M.
Hector de la Faloise, a young man who had come to finish his education
in Paris. The manager took the young man’s measure at a glance. But
Hector returned his scrutiny with deep interest. This, then, was that
Bordenave, that showman of the sex who treated women like a convict
overseer, that clever fellow who was always at full steam over some
advertising dodge, that shouting, spitting, thigh-slapping fellow, that
cynic with the soul of a policeman! Hector was under the impression
that he ought to discover some amiable observation for the occasion.
“Your theater—” he began in dulcet tones.
Bordenave interrupted him with a savage phrase, as becomes a man who
dotes on frank situations.
“Call it my brothel!”
At this Fauchery laughed approvingly, while La Faloise stopped with his
pretty speech strangled in his throat, feeling very much shocked and
striving to appear as though he enjoyed the phrase. The manager had
dashed off to shake hands with a dramatic critic whose column had
considerable influence. When he returned La Faloise was recovering. He
was afraid of being treated as a provincial if he showed himself too
much nonplused.
“I have been told,” he began again, longing positively to find
something to say, “that Nana has a delicious voice.”
“Nana?” cried the manager, shrugging his shoulders. “The voice of a
squirt!”
The young man made haste to add:
“Besides being a first-rate comedian!”
“She? Why she’s a lump! She has no notion what to do with her hands and
feet.”
La Faloise blushed a little. He had lost his bearings. He stammered:
“I wouldn’t have missed this first representation tonight for the
world. I was aware that your theater—”
“Call it my brothel,” Bordenave again interpolated with the frigid
obstinacy of a man convinced.
Meanwhile Fauchery, with extreme calmness, was looking at the women as
they came in. He went to his cousin’s rescue when he saw him all at sea
and doubtful whether to laugh or to be angry.
“Do be pleasant to Bordenave—call his theater what he wishes you to,
since it amuses him. And you, my dear fellow, don’t keep us waiting
about for nothing. If your Nana neither sings nor acts you’ll find
you’ve made a blunder, that’s all. It’s what I’m afraid of, if the
truth be told.”
“A blunder! A blunder!” shouted the manager, and his face grew purple.
“Must a woman know how to act and sing? Oh, my chicken, you’re too
STOOPID. Nana has other good points, by heaven!—something which is as
good as all the other things put together. I’ve smelled it out; it’s
deuced pronounced with her, or I’ve got the scent of an idiot. You’ll
see, you’ll see! She’s only got to come on, and all the house will be
gaping at her.”
He had held up his big hands which were trembling under the influence
of his eager enthusiasm, and now, having relieved his feelings, he
lowered his voice and grumbled to himself:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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