Fräulein Schmidt and Mr. AnstrutherVon Arnim, Elizabeth
General
Fräulein Schmidt and Mr. Anstruther
Von Arnim, Elizabeth
British -- Germany -- Fiction; Epistolary fiction; Germany -- Fiction; Love stories; Young women -- Fiction
Dear Mr. Anstruther,--I assure you that we have all we want, so do not,
please, go on feeling distressed about us. Why should you feel
distressed? I am not certain that I do not resent it. Put baldly (you
will say brutally), you have no right to be distressed, uneasy, anxious,
and all the other things you say you are, about the private concerns of
persons who are nothing to you. Even a lamb might conceivably feel
nettled by persistent pity when it knows it has everything in the world
it wants. Come now, if it is a question of pity, we will have it in the
right place, and I will pity you. There is always, you know, a secret
satisfaction in the soul of him who pities. He does hug himself, and
whether he does it consciously or unconsciously depends on his aptitude
for clear self-criticism. Compared with yours I deliberately consider my
life glorious. And when will you see that there are kinds of
gloriousness that cannot be measured in money or position? It is plain
to me--and it would be so to you if you thought it over--that the less
one has the more one enjoys. We want space, time, concentration, for
getting at the true sweet root of life. And I think--and you probably do
not--that the true sweet root of life is in any one thing, no matter
what thing, on which your whole undisturbed attention is fixed. Once I
read a little French story, years ago, with my mother, when I was a
child, and I don't know now who wrote it or what it was called. It was
the story of a prisoner who found a plant growing between the flags of
the court he might walk in, and I think it was a wallflower; and it,
unfolding itself slowly and putting out one tender bit of green after
the other in that gray and stony place, stretched out little hands of
life and hope and interest to the man who had come there a lost soul. It
was the one thing he had. It ended by being his passion. With nothing
else to distract him, he could study all its wonders. From that single
plant he learned more than the hurried passer-on, free of the treasures
of the universe, learns in a life. It saved him from despair. It brought
him back to the eager interest in the marvellous world that soul feels
which is unencumbered by too heavy a weight of trappings. Why, I still
have too much; and here are you pitying me because I have not more when
I am distracted by all the claims on my attention. I can look at whole
beds of wallflowers every spring, and pass on with nothing but a vague
admiration for their massed beauty of scent and color. I get nothing out
of them but just that transient glimpse and whiff. There are too many.
There is no time for them all. But shut me up for weeks alone with one
of them in a pot, and I too would get out of it the measure of the
height and the depth and the wonder of life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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