Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one act — John Shaqi
Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one actPemberton, T. Edgar (Thomas Edgar)
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Freezing a Mother-in-Law; or, Suspended Animation: A farce in one act
Pemberton, T. Edgar (Thomas Edgar)
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
MRS. W. A short farewell, sir, is all that is necessary--and more than
I shall allow. My domestics will have instructions to remove you,
within five minutes, from this domain. What ho! there--cook and
serving-maid!
(_Exit_ MRS. WATMUFF, _door_ L.)
EMILY. Walter, surely you do not mean to give me up!
WALTER. My darling, do you--can you--doubt me? I shall never give you
up; but I am convinced that our only course is to temporize. Your
mother is, to say the least of it, arbitrary; but does she not give me
a glorious chance of proving the strength of my affection for you?
EMILY. How, dearest?
WALTER. I am prepared to marry you, my darling, even during her
lifetime.
(_Enter_ MR. WATMUFF, _door_ R.)
EMILY. Oh, papa, I am in sad trouble. Mamma still withholds her
consent.
MR. W. My dear child, your mother, with the exception of her tongue,
has a habit of withholding everything.
EMILY. And she has ordered Walter to quit the house.
MR. W. Well, my dear, beyond a not unnatural feeling of envy for
Walter, I don't feel that I can express any sentiment on the subject. I
have given my consent.
EMILY. But of what use is it?
MR. W. Not much, my dear, I must own. But I thought you might derive
some comfort from it.
EMILY. Do you know that mamma is now giving orders to the cook and
housemaid to remove poor Walter by force?
MR. W. My dear child, it is, I must admit, an extreme measure. But what
can I do?
EMILY. You ought not to brook such treatment.
MR. W. Dearest love, I don't know that I do brook it; because I never
mastered the full meaning of that word. But even if I did, how can I
unbrook it?
WALTER. My dear sir, I think I comprehend your position better than
poor Emily does; and, indeed, I have been trying to persuade her that
our better plan is to yield to the storm until it has passed. We must
remember the old fable of the oak and the willow.
MR. W. It has been Mrs. Watmuff's good fortune to dwell in a perfect
grove of willows since the day of her birth. I confess that I have
yielded so long that I am limp with yielding.
WALTER. And I mean to yield only so far as to retain strength for a
final spring, and a final growth in a right and firm direction. Come,
Emily, be guided by me, and I promise you all shall be well. If I
remain here a moment longer I fear the storm may burst, and at present
we are both too oak-like to stand it.
(_Exeunt_ EMILY _and_ WALTER, _door_ R.)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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