Then the newly elected stands at a reading-desk and reads out the
eulogy of his predecessor, which a committee has already been convened
to consider, and when he terminates his “discourse,” his godfathers
warmly shake his hand, and he sits down. The academician who receives
him in the name of the august assembly replies, and reads his discourse
sitting, placed between the chancellor and secretary, at the centre
table, on a high daïs. When the speakers read their discourses as M.
Brunetière reads his, it is a pleasure, whether you agree with them or
not; but this is rare, for M. Brunetière was meant by nature to be a
preacher or an actor. His elocution is magnificent, his voice arresting;
whereas the average man is hard to follow and, in winter, is apt to
have a cold in his head. After the ceremony, greetings during the exit,
which is slow and precarious, and in the big courtyard proclaim you a
fashionable person, and reveal to you the utter vanity of the whole
affair. Then you understand why it is that women are supposed to be the
pillars of the institution. There is something essentially wrong about
fashionable women. They must, perforce, worship false gods. When they
admire a writer, or a musician, or a dramatist, they are not happy until
they see him in a false position. They must make a fool of him before
they can consent to worship him. He administers to their vanity, and
they administer to his. And so they go in a body to crown him; and not
to be present at the crowning is a confession of social inferiority.
Being more intelligent than the same class of women elsewhere, their
folly takes this form of rendering interesting men ridiculous. If I
thought them capable of humour and irony (which they are not), I might
regard this as the supreme vengeance of their sex, excluded by national
prejudice from all public honours. But, alas! no. They are in deadly
earnest, and take their great men with rapture and gravity. They, at any
rate, and the Immortals themselves, really believe in the Academy. They
swallow each other, and piously give thanks for the meal. The fashionable
woman hastens to invite the new Immortal to dinner for the exquisite
satisfaction of giving him the place of honour and conferring distinction
upon herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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