Frivolities, Especially Addressed to Those Who Are Tired of Being SeriousMarsh, Richard
General
Frivolities, Especially Addressed to Those Who Are Tired of Being Serious
Marsh, Richard
Fiction; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
Saunders vanished. There was the sound of voices--one of them
belonging to Saunders, the other, undoubtedly, to that member of the
unemployed. He seemed to be shouting at Saunders, and Saunders, in a
dignified way, seemed to be shouting back at him. Presently there was
a lull. Saunders reappeared.
"Well, has the fellow gone?"
"No, sir. And he says he isn't going."
"Did you give him to understand that I should send for the police?"
"He says he should like to see you send for the police. He says that
the police will soon show you if you can rob a poor man of his purse.
He's a most impudent fellow. As for the purse which you found being
his, sir, I don't believe he knows what a purse is. He's a regular
vagabond!"
"I quite agree with you, Saunders--quite! That is my opinion of the
man precisely."
"There are five other persons who wish to see you. Three of them have
cards, and two of them haven't."
He held out three cards on a waiter, taking my breath away.
"Five, Saunders! Where are these people?"
"In the hall, sir."
"I won't see anyone till I've had my breakfast. I'm not going to have
all my habits disarranged simply because I happen to have found a
purse. I ought to have stated that no applications were to be made
till after twelve; I never dreamt that people would have come at this
time of day. Show the people with the cards into the drawing-room, and
leave the others in the hall. And, Saunders, it would be a little
obvious, perhaps, to remove the hats and umbrellas from before their
very faces, but keep a sharp eye on them!"
I glanced at the trio of visiting-cards, as, once more, I made an
attempt to continue my meal. "Mrs. Chillingby-Harkworth, Pagoda
Mansions, S.W.," "Colonel Fitzakarley Beering," "George Parkins."
The idea of a number of entire strangers being turned loose in my
drawing-room was one I did not relish. I felt I ought to have stated
that applications in writing would alone have been attended to.
I had imagined that, by not taking my find to the police-station, I
should be saving myself trouble. I perceived that my imagination had
been at fault. I had had no notion that such a number of people had
lost their purses. A constant fusillade was being kept up on the
knocker. I might have been giving a fashionable assembly, and
requested the guests to arrive in time for breakfast. All at once
there was a violent ringing at the drawing-room bell.
In came Saunders with a stack of cards on a tray and some telegrams.
"Well, Saunders, many people here?"
"More than twenty inside the house, and I don't know how many there
are outside--I know the pavement's getting blocked. The drawing-room
is full, and the hall is crammed. Queer ones some of them are; they
don't look to me as if they were the sort to lose their purses. And
now the lady whose card I brought up to you has rung the bell, and
says that she insists on seeing you at once."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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