When the author of this volume, as an unquestioning disciple of his ancestral fellowship, earnestly sought to pledge all that he was and all that he hoped to become to the salvation of those who he believed stood in peril of everlasting torment, it was the unadulterated spirit of religion which prompted him. But he was at that time unaware of that fact. Religion was with him when it moved him to give himself for others, but to him religion was itself something entirely different. He was urged and commanded by a force, old as mankind, and it took him, as the reader of these pages will see, many years of heart-breaking endeavor, to learn that what most he desired was what most he possessed. His quest was a long and weary one, and the reality of it and the importance of it to him are proven by the thoroughness and the eloquence with which his spiritual experience is recalled and set down in these pages. Only one who had begun in earnest, proceeded in anxiety and continued to the end, as if he absolutely believed in the integrity of the human reason and the intimate friendliness of a supreme Guidance, could have emerged at last triumphantly and with the ability to tell the tale. To him who thinks of religion only as a matter of course, or as an affair of the church, or as a medium of social advantage; or to him who identifies religion with the ravings of half-witted fanatics and regards it with patronizing contempt, this book will make no appeal. But to the man or woman who has learned that religion is one thing and theology another, and at whatever cost, is willing to share with the author in his struggle to know the truth about it and be at peace, these pages will command undivided attention; for they relate not only the story of mental perplexity ending in a great personal solution, but they likewise have the charm of a real romance of the soul. LEWIS G. WILSON. CONTENTS CHAPTER I MY CHILDHOOD, YOUTH AND EDUCATION II SEEKING LIBERTY III NEW VISIONS AND DISTURBANCES IV NEARER THE CRISIS V THE CRISIS VI THE REACTION: A NEW CONFESSION OF FAITH VII A NEW INTERPRETATION OF RELIGION VIII JESUS OF NAZARETH FROM BONDAGE TO LIBERTY IN RELIGION A RELIGIOUS AUTOBIOGRAPHY CHAPTER I MY CHILDHOOD, YOUTH AND EDUCATION