"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional ladyLoos, Anita
General
"Gentlemen prefer blondes" : $b The illuminating diary of a professional lady
Loos, Anita
Diary fiction; Humorous stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Millionaires -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
So everything always works out for the best, because this morning Mr.
Spoffard called up and told me he wanted me to meet his mother. So I
told him I would like to have luncheon alone with his mother because we
could have quite a little tatatate if there was only two of us. So I
told him to bring his mother to our room for luncheon because I thought
that Miss Chapman could not walk into our room and spoil everything.
So he brought his mother down to our sitting room and I put on quite a
simple little organdy gown that I had ripped all of the trimming off
of, and I had a pair of black lace mitts that Dorothy used to wear in
the Follies and I had a pair of shoes that did not have any heels on
them. So when he introduced us to each other I dropped her a courtesy
because I always think it is quite quaint when a girl drops quite a lot
of courtesys. So then he left us alone and we had quite a little talk
and I told her that I did not seem to like all of the flappers that we
seem to have nowadays, because I was brought up to be more old
fashioned. So then Mr. Spoffards mother told me that Miss Chapman said
that she had heard that I was not so old fashioned. But I told her that
I was so old fashioned that I was always full of respect for all of my
elders and I would not dare to tell them everything they ought to do,
like Miss Chapman seems to tell her everything she ought to do, for
instants.
So then I ordered luncheon and I thought some champagne would make her
feel quite good for luncheon so I asked her if she liked champagne. So
she really likes champagne very very much but Miss Chapman thinks it is
not so nice for a person to drink liquor. But I told her that I was a
Christian science, and all of we Christian science seem to believe that
there can not really be any harm in anything, so how can there be any
harm in a small size bottle of champagne? So she never seemed to look
at it in that kind of a light before, because she said that Miss
Chapman believed in Christian science also, but what Miss Chapman
believed about things that were good for you to drink seemed to apply
more towards water. So then we had luncheon and she began to feel very
very good. So I thought that we had better have another bottle of
champagne because I told her that I was such an ardent Christian
science that I did not even believe there could be any harm in two
bottles of champagne. So we had another bottle of champagne and she
became very intreeged about Christian science because she said that she
really thought it was a better religion than Prespyterians. So she said
Miss Chapman used to try to get her to use it on things, but Miss
Chapman never seemed to have such a large size grasp of the Christian
science religion as I seem to have.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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