"I shall see her to-day!" I exclaim with delight, when I rise in the
morning, and look out with gladness of heart at the bright, beautiful
sun. "I shall see her to-day!" and then I have no further wish to form;
all, all is included in that one thought.
July 20.
I cannot assent to your proposal that I should accompany the ambassador
to ----. I do not love subordination; and we all know that he is a
rough, disagreeable person to be connected with. You say my mother
wishes me to be employed. I could not help laughing at that. Am I not
sufficiently employed? And is it not in reality the same, whether I
shell pease or count lentils? The world runs on from one folly to
another; and the man who, solely from regard to the opinion of others,
and without any wish or necessity of his own, toils after gold, honour,
or any other phantom, is no better than a fool.
July 24.
You insist so much on my not neglecting my drawing, that it would be as
well for me to say nothing as to confess how little I have lately done.
I never felt happier, I never understood Nature better, even down to
the veriest stem or smallest blade of grass; and yet I am unable to
express myself: my powers of execution are so weak, everything seems to
swim and float before me, so that I cannot make a clear, bold outline.
But I fancy I should succeed better if I had some clay or wax to model.
I shall try, if this state of mind continues much longer, and will take
to modelling, if I only knead dough.
I have commenced Charlotte's portrait three times, and have as often
disgraced myself. This is the more annoying, as I was formerly very
happy in taking likenesses. I have since sketched her profile, and must
content myself with that.
July 25.
Yes, dear Charlotte! I will order and arrange everything. Only give me
more commissions, the more the better. One thing, however, I must
request: use no more writing-sand with the dear notes you send me.
To-day I raised your letter hastily to my lips, and it set my teeth on
edge.
July 26.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account