Women -- France -- History -- 19th century -- Fiction; Working class women -- France -- Fiction
This priest was young. He was kind-hearted. He had lived in the world. A
great sorrow had impelled him, crushed and broken, to assume the gown
wherein he wore mourning for his heart. There remained something of the
man in the depths of his being, and he listened, with melancholy
compassion, to the outpouring of this maidservant's suffering heart. He
understood that Germinie needed him, that he sustained and strengthened
her, that he saved her from herself and removed her from the temptations
to which her nature exposed her. He was conscious of a sad sympathy for
that heart overflowing with affection, for the ardent, yet tractable
girl, for the unhappy creature who knew nothing of her own nature, who
was promised to passion by every impulse of her heart, by her whole
body, and who betrayed in every detail of her person the vocation of her
temperament. Enlightened by his past experience, he was amazed and
terrified sometimes by the gleams that emanated from her, by the flame
that shot from her eyes at the outburst of love in a prayer, by the
evident tendency of her confessions, by her constantly recurring to that
scene of violence, that scene in which her perfectly sincere purpose to
resist seemed to the priest to have been betrayed by a convulsion of the
senses that was stronger than she.
This fever of religion lasted several years, during which Germinie lived
a concentrated, silent, happy life, entirely devoted to God's
service--at least she thought so. Her confessor, however, had come
gradually to the conclusion that all her adoration tended toward
himself. By her glances, by her blushes, by the words she no longer said
to him, and by others which she made bold to say to him for the first
time, he realized that his penitent's devotion was going astray and
becoming unduly fervent, deceiving itself as to its object. She watched
for him when the services were at an end, followed him into the
sacristy, hung on his skirts, ran into the church after his cassock. The
confessor tried to warn her, to divert her amorous fervor from himself.
He became more reserved and assumed a cold demeanor. In despair at this
change, at his apparent indifference, Germinie, feeling bitter and hurt,
confessed to him one day, in the confessional, the hatred that had taken
possession of her for two young girls, who were his favorite penitents.
Thereupon the priest dismissed her, without discussion, and sent her to
another confessor. Germinie went once or twice to confess to this other
confessor; then she ceased to go; soon she ceased even to think of
going, and of all her religion naught remained in her mind but a certain
far-off sweetness, like the faint odor of burned-out incense.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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