Get-Rich-Quick Wallingford: A Cheerful Account of the Rise and Fall of an American Business BuccaneerChester, George Randolph
General
Get-Rich-Quick Wallingford: A Cheerful Account of the Rise and Fall of an American Business Buccaneer
Chester, George Randolph
Businessmen -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Swindlers and swindling -- Fiction
"Very well, sir," he observed. "Fox & Fleecer never makes any promises,
but if you will put your instructions into writing I will place them in
the hands of our Mr. Fleecer, who conducts our board operations. He will
do the best he can for you."
Mr. Wallingford looked about him for a stenographer. There was none
employed here, and, sitting down to the little writing table which was
pointed out to him, he made out the instructions in long hand, while Mr.
Fox polished away at his already glistening pate, still working at that
blandly interesting secret problem.
Ten days later, at the test-tube farm, arrived a report from Messrs. Fox
& Fleecer, inclosing their check for fifteen thousand dollars. Wheat, in
the week following Wallingford's purchase, had fortunately gone up
nearly six cents. This check, and the accompanying statement of the
transaction which had brought it forth, Wallingford showed to Ham
Tinkle, quite incidentally, of course, and Ham, in awe and enthusiasm,
confided the five-thousand-dollar winning to Hiram Hines, who spread the
report through Truscot County that Judge Wallingford had already made
fifteen thousand dollars in wheat since he had come among them. The
savings of an ordinary lifetime! The amount was fifty thousand when it
reached Mapes County. Two weeks later Messrs. Fox & Fleecer reported on
the second of Wallingford's deals. Wheat sold at ninety-four had dropped
to eighty-eight. Luck was distinctly with J. Rufus Wallingford.
"Why, oh, why, do cheap skates sell gold bricks and good come-on men
waste their talents on Broadway!" wailed Blackie Daw. "But what's the
joke, J. Rufus? I see your luck, but where do the surrounding farmers
get in? Or where do you get in on the surrounding farmers? Show me. I'm
an infant."
"You couldn't understand it, Blackie," said J. Rufus with condescending
kindness. "The mere fact that you look on these pocket-change winnings
as real money lets you out. Wait till I spring the big game. To-morrow
night you shall attend this winter's opening meeting of the Philomathean
Literary Society at the Willow Creek schoolhouse, and observe the
methods of a real bread winner."
For the memorable occasion that he had mentioned, Wallingford wore a
fur-lined overcoat and quadruple-woven blue silk sweater, and, being
welcomed with great acclaim, proposed for debate that burning question:
"Resolved: That the farmer is a failure as a business man."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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