Mors omnibus! at length The hay-day of his life was damped by death; So, summoning all his late remaining strength, He drew his—final breath. GRAND SCHEME OF EMIGRATION. The Brewers should to _Malt-a_ go, The Loggerheads to _Scilly_, The Quakers to the _Friendly Isles_, The Furriers all to _Chili_. The little squalling, brawling brats, That break our nightly rest, Should be packed off to _Baby-lon_, To _Lap-land_, or to _Brest_. From _Spit-head_ Cooks go o’er to _Greece_; And while the Miser waits His passage to the _Guinea_ coast, Spendthrifts are in the _Straits_. Spinsters should to the _Needles_ go, Wine-bibbers to _Burgundy_; Gourmands should lunch at _Sandwich Isles_, Wags in the _Bay of Fun-dy_. Musicians hasten to the _Sound_, The surpliced Priest to _Rome_; While still the race of Hypocrites At _Cant-on_ are at home. Lovers should hasten to _Good Hope_; To some _Cape Horn_ is pain; Debtors should go to _Oh-i-o_, And Sailors to the _Main-e_. Hie, Bachelors, to the _United States_! Maids, to the _Isle of Man_; Let Gardeners go to _Botany Bay_, And Shoeblacks to _Japan_. Thus, emigrants and misplaced men Will then no longer vex us; And all that a’n’t provided for Had better go to _Texas_. THE PERILOUS PRACTICE OF PUNNING. Theodore Hook thus cautions young people to resist provocation to the habit of punning:—