Our walk was certainly not a success, in fact I was very sick of it
before we reached Oxford, because I am no good at walking and cannot
stride along at a steady pace. And it also involved me in what, if
real diplomatists will pardon me, I will call diplomacy, in which art
or craft, or whatever the right name of it may be, I am most unskilled.
I was on the point of telling Fred that I knew the party of peashooters
when he, being in a much happier state of mind than he had been in the
morning, began to talk about Jack Ward, and to say that I was very
likely right about him, and that he was sure to be a nice kind of man
when one got to know him. Hearing this made me put off what I was
going to say, and when I begin to postpone anything I am lost. Second
thoughts with me nearly always lead to trouble, however good they may
be for other people. I think I must have taken a fatherly interest in
Ward, for what else it could have been which made me wish to shield him
I do not know. But I had seen him stand up in the dog-cart, and I
thought he had recognized me and had tried to make Langham turn back,
so I determined not to tell Fred anything until I had found out what
really happened. But I felt very uncomfortable, for I do hate keeping
things dark, and when he went on to say that the pea-shooting people
must have been unutterable bounders to go away and leave us in the
lurch, I was again on the point of telling him that Ward was one of
them, only he suddenly began to sing, which gave me time to think, and
frightened two children who came round a corner of the road. We were
quite close to Broadmoor lunatic asylum at that moment, and Fred
walking along with his hat in his hand might easily have been mistaken
for some one else. His mood had become most cheerful, and he said that
he did not suppose Tom Harrison would ever be heard of again, and that
the whole thing had been rather fun; but he added that he should like
to tell the men who had been in the room above us what he thought of
them. He also told me that he had never known me so quiet, and when I
continued to be silent he asked me if I was well, which annoyed me, for
I am often asked that question when I do not happen to be talking, and
in a lurking sort of way there seems to me to be something insulting
about it. I answered that I was thinking, which was quite true, but he
only laughed and said I must have changed a lot lately. I was quite
tired of him before we separated in the High, and he was angry because
I would not go to Oriel and have tea, but I felt that the day so far
had been a hopeless failure, and I wanted to see Jack Ward.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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