Graham's Magazine, Vol. XX, No. 1, January 1842Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XX, No. 1, January 1842
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
“Na, na,” he answered, shaking his head, “though it pains my heart to
say so, yet it is best you should know the truth. It will na be long
before the snows shall lie aboon me. But I see it makes you greet. I
will pass on, Jeanie, to what lies heavy on my heart, and that is, when
I am awa, there will be no one to protect you. Could I hae seen ye
comfortably settled, wi’ some one to shield ye from the cauld world, I
could hae gone to my grave in peace. But it maun na be, it maun na be.”
Poor Jeanie had listened to her father’s words with emotions we will not
attempt to pourtray. Long after every one else had given over her lover
for lost—and besides a rumor, now of two years standing, that he had
been drowned at sea, there was the fact of his not returning at the
appointed time, to silence all skepticism—she had clung to the hope of
his being alive, even when her reason forbid the expression of that
hope. She had long read her father’s thoughts, nor could she indeed
blame them. Their poverty was daily growing more extreme, so that while
her parent’s health was declining, he was compelled to deny himself even
the few comforts which he had hitherto possessed. These things cut
Jeanie to the heart, and yet she saw no remedy for them, except in what
seemed to her more terrible than death. Her affection for her lover was
only strengthened and purified by his loss. Try as she would, she could
not tear his image from her heart. Loving him thus, living or dead, how
could she wed another?—how could she take on herself vows her heart
refused to fulfil? Day after day, week after week, and month after
month, had this struggle been going on in her bosom, betwixt duty to her
father and love for him to whom she had plighted her virgin vows. This
evening her parent had spoken to her, mildly but seriously on the death
of her lover, and Jeanie’s heart was more than ever melted by the
self-devotedness with which her gray-haired father had alluded to her
want of protection in case of his death, not even saying a word of the
want of the common comforts of life which his growing infirmities
rendered more necessary than ever, but of which her conduct—oh! how
selfish in that moment it seemed to her—deprived him. It was some
moments before Jeanie could speak, during which time she lay weeping on
her parent’s bosom. At length she murmured,
“Do wi’ me as ye wish, father, I maun resist no longer, sin’ it were
wicked. But oh! gie me a little while to prepare, for the heart is
rebellious and hard to overcome. I know you do it all for the best—but
I maun hae some delay to tear the last thoughts o’ Willie, thoughts
which soon wi’ be sinfu’, from my heart”—and overcome by the intensity
of her emotions she burst into a new flood of tears. Her father pressed
her to his bosom, and murmured,
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