Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXI, No. 2, August 1842Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXI, No. 2, August 1842
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
“A well invented story of high birth, unmerited misfortunes, and a long
cherished passion for me, awakened my sympathy, and I soon imagined that
nothing could repay my lover’s tenderness but the bestowal of my hand
and fortune. I fancied myself deeply and devotedly attached to one who
had submitted to the degradation of disguise for my sake, and, on the
day when I attained my sixteenth year, I eloped with my lover, who now
dropped his assumed title and adopted his true name of Wallingford. As
my guardian was at that time in Paris, we met with no molestation, and
were privately married in London, where we had decided to take up our
abode. I afterwards learned that those of my teachers who had been
parties to the plot were well paid for their services, while the only
real sufferer was the principal of the establishment, who had been kept
in total ignorance of the scheme, and whose dignified sense of propriety
was shocked at having such a stigma affixed to her school. When my
guardian returned he read me a lecture on my imprudence, and tried to
satisfy his conscience for past neglect, by refusing to allow me more
than a mere maintenance until I should attain my majority. To this,
however, I refused submission, and the matter was finally compromised in
a manner quite satisfactory to both parties. Mr. Wallingford immediately
engaged elegant lodgings, and we commenced living in a style better
suited to my future fortune than to my actual income.
“My heart sickens when I look back to the weary years which succeeded my
imprudent marriage. As time matured my judgment I was pained by the
discovery of many weaknesses and faults in my husband, to which I would
willingly have remained blind. Yet the discovery of these did not impair
the simple, child-like affection with which I regarded the only being on
earth to whom I was bound by any ties. I clung to him as the only one in
the wide world whom I was permitted to love, and it required but little
effort on his part to have strengthened my girlish fondness into the
lasting fervor of womanly tenderness. While yet I remained in my
minority Mr. Wallingford treated me with some show of consideration.
Fitful gleams of kindness, transient visitings of former fondness,
glimpses of the better nature which had been so perverted by evil
habits, and endearments still bestowed in moments of persuasion, linked
my heart to the ideal which I had enshrined in his image. But no sooner
was I put in possession of my fortune than he threw off the mask
entirely. I was too much in his power to render any further concealment
necessary, and he now appeared before me in all the true deformity of
his character. Dissipated in his habits, coarse in his feelings, low in
his pursuits and pleasures, he had only sought me for the wealth which
could minister to his depravity.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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