Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 3, September 1849Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXV, No. 3, September 1849
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
Wild and impetuous and almost fierce by nature, he had brooded from his
very boyhood upward over his real and imaginary wrongs, until the iron
had so deeply pierced his soul, that he could see nothing but coldness,
and hostility, and persecution in the conduct of all around him, with
the exception of his old student uncle and his sweet Theresa. Ever
suspecting, ever anticipating injury and insult, or at least coldness
and repulsion from all with whom he was brought into contact, he
actually generated in the breasts of others the feelings which he
imputed to them all unjustly. Accusing the world of injustice or ere it
was unjust, in the end he made it to be so indeed; and then hated it,
and railed against it, for that which it had never dreamed of, but for
his own fantastic waywardness.
It was unfortunate for Durzil, that the good man, into whose care he had
fallen, ever of a philosophical and studious, nay, even mystic
disposition, had become, since the sad fate of his beloved sister, and
the early death of a yet dearer wife, so wholly visionary, so entirely
given up to the wildest theorizing, the most abstruse and abstract
metaphysical inquiries, that no one could have been devised less fitting
for the guardian and instructor of a high-spirited, hot-headed, fiery
boy than he was.
The consequence of this was, as it might have been expected, that
disgusted early with the strange sorts of learning which the old man
persisted in forcing into him against the grain, and discontented with
the stillness and deathlike tranquillity of all around him, the boy ran
away from his distasteful home, and shipped for the India voyage in a
free-trader, half merchantman, half-picaroon, before he had yet attained
his thirteenth year. In that wild and turbulent career, well suited to
his daring and contemptuous spirit, he had, as he himself expressed it,
become hardened and inured not to toils and sufferings only, but to
thoughts and feelings, habits and opinions, which perhaps now could
never be eradicated from his nature, of which they had become, as it
were, part and parcel.
When he returned, well nigh a man in years, and quite a man in stature,
and perhaps more than most men in courage, resource, coolness and
audacity, old Allan, to whom he had written once or twice, apprising him
that he had adopted the sea as his home and his profession, received him
with a hearty welcome, and with few or no inquiries as to the period
during which he had been absent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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