Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXVI, No. 2, February 1850Various
General
Graham's Magazine, Vol. XXXVI, No. 2, February 1850
Various
Literature -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
“You remarked,” said he, “that scepticism is often referable to
some former error of life, and the sceptic is only seeking to
hide his fears of consequences in another state of existence, by
creating a belief that there is no other state.”
“That was the inference, if not the words of my remarks,” said
I.
“Well, I have thought much of it since you left me, and I have
wished for life to repair if possible some injuries which I have
done to others. The very feverish condition in which I find
myself, and which I heard the doctor say would be dangerous
should it come, leads me to fear that I shall not be able to
accomplish my wish; and struck with the peculiar expression of
your face, and the coincidence of your name—”
“That is my mother’s name,” said I.
“But you were born in this town?”
I gave no answer.
“Nevertheless, I will yield to the suggestion which I have felt,
if you will allow me, and show you that while I have greatly
erred, and may refer my scepticism to my errors, I yet have
sought to repair a part of the injuries I did in my youth.”
“If I heard your statement, should I be at liberty to tell my
mother, because I do not like to hear anything which I may not
communicate to her; and, of course, I could not tell, and she
would not hear what was told to me in strict confidence?”
The captain reached his uninjured arm over the bed-side, and
pressed my hand. I understood it to be a commendation of your
instructions to me, and a consent that I should be at liberty to
repeat what he said. But, oh, what a fever was scorching his
skin.
“I was left with a fortune, a good education, and a knowledge of
mercantile life. Too young to have the guidance of myself—but I
escaped what the world calls gross dissipation.
“At 21 I was married to a poor, friendless girl, whom I had
_injured_. I was married in the morning at 6 o’clock, and in
half an hour left the home of my wife, whom I never saw again.
“I returned from Europe in about a year, having added much to my
knowledge of the world, and to my means of enjoying it. In New
York, I met a young lady, whose excellence in every female
qualification so enraptured me, let me say rather, so awakened
in me the slumbering affection of my heart, that I became
attentive, and found that I had been successful in inducing love
for me in her breast. I will not, for my mind now seems to
waver, I will not attempt to describe the progress of my
courtship. But when I returned from another voyage to England, I
led Amelia to the altar. We were married in Grace Church; and if
mortal ever felt happy, certainly I did, as I handed my wife
into the parlor of her distant relative with whom she
resided—her father and mother having been dead for some years.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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