Great Catherine (Whom Glory Still Adores)Shaw, Bernard
General
Great Catherine (Whom Glory Still Adores)
Shaw, Bernard
Catherine II, Empress of Russia, 1729-1796 -- Drama; English drama (Comedy)
VARINKA. His Highness the prince is very busy. He is singing out of
tune; he is biting his nails; he is scratching his head; he is hitching
up his untidy stockings; he is making himself disgusting and odious to
everybody; and he is pretending to read state papers that he does
not understand because he is too lazy and selfish to talk and be
companionable.
PATIOMKIN [growls; then wipes his nose with his dressing-gown]!!
VARINKA. Pig. Ugh! [She curls herself up with a shiver of disgust and
retires from the conversation.]
THE SERGEANT [stealing across to the coat, and picking it up to replace
it on the back of the chair]. Little Father, the English captain,
so highly recommended to you by old Fritz of Prussia, by the English
ambassador, and by Monsieur Voltaire (whom [crossing himself] may God in
his infinite mercy damn eternally!), is in the antechamber and desires
audience.
PATIOMKIN [deliberately]. To hell with the English captain; and to hell
with old Fritz of Prussia; and to hell with the English ambassador; and
to hell with Monsieur Voltaire; and to hell with you too!
THE SERGEANT. Have mercy on me, Little Father. Your head is bad this
morning. You drink too much French brandy and too little good Russian
kvass.
PATIOMKIN [with sudden fury]. Why are visitors of consequence announced
by a sergeant? [Springing at him and seizing him by the throat.] What
do you mean by this, you hound? Do you want five thousand blows of the
stick? Where is General Volkonsky?
THE SERGEANT [on his knees]. Little Father, you kicked his Highness
downstairs.
PATIOMKIN [flinging him dawn and kicking him]. You lie, you dog. You
lie.
THE SERGEANT. Little Father, life is hard for the poor. If you say it is
a lie, it is a lie. He FELL downstairs. I picked him up; and he kicked
me. They all kick me when you kick them. God knows that is not just,
Little Father!
PATIOMKIN [laughs ogreishly; then returns to his place at the table,
chuckling]!!!
VARINKA. Savage! Boot! It is a disgrace. No wonder the French sneer at
us as barbarians.
THE SERGEANT [who has crept round the table to the screen, and
insinuated himself between Patiomkin's back and Varinka]. Do you think
the Prince will see the captain, little darling?
PATIOMKIN. He will not see any captain. Go to the devil!
THE SERGEANT. Be merciful, Little Father. God knows it is your duty to
see him! [To Varinka.] Intercede for him and for me, beautiful little
darling. He has given me a rouble.
PATIOMKIN. Oh, send him in, send him in; and stop pestering me. Am I
never to have a moment's peace?
The Sergeant salutes joyfully and hurries out, divining that Patiomkin
has intended to see the English captain all along, and has played this
comedy of fury and exhausted impatience to conceal his interest in the
visitor.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account