Grey Wethers: A Romantic NovelSackville-West, V. (Victoria)
General
Grey Wethers: A Romantic Novel
Sackville-West, V. (Victoria)
Great Britain -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Romance fiction; Social classes -- Fiction
He set aside upon a tray a cup of tea, when he had made it, and a bowl
of gruel for the bedridden old woman upstairs. This he gave to Olver,
telling him to carry it up carefully, and stood himself at the foot of
the stairs holding up the candle for a light. He heard the door open
above, and his mother’s querulous voice. He smiled grimly to himself as
he thought of how long she had been waiting for her tea, and of what
she would have said could she have known the cause, and have seen the
two figures of himself and Clare standing in the sunlight on the Downs.
This radiant vision of Clare crossed his heart in a flash; it hurt him.
_Had_ his mother seen them? he never knew himself the true extent of
the powers he must not allow himself to think about, because he was
afraid of them. Gipsy Lovel, he knew they called him in the village....
Olver came down again, and still his eyes sought his brother’s face
to find whether he had been forgiven. His brother’s servility and
excessive devotion to himself exasperated Nicholas. He sat over his
supper tossing bits of food to the dogs, and trying to pretend to
himself that Olver with his searching eyes and anxious face was not
sitting opposite to him in mute beseeching, hanging on to his looks and
gestures. Nicholas despised himself for his churlishness, but to-night
his home, his brother, were violently intolerable to him. He could not
breathe, he was being stifled; he rose nervously and kicked the logs
into a blaze; in the middle of doing this he swung round.
“Why do you follow me so with your gaze?” he asked impatiently.
“You are angry with me, Nicco, for having forgotten the supper, but
indeed I thought only of you, and you are all I have in the world.”
Lovel said, not unkindly, “Well, you wasted your anxiety: I am better
able than most to look after myself. I am not angry any more,” but in
spite of his words he still felt that the house oppressed him, and
that a restlessness, usually kept under control, was gnawing at him.
He knew well whom to blame: it was Clare, who appeared to him the
personification of all he had abjured. He had had Clare for two hours
before his eyes, the sight of her stirring him as the wind stirs a
bell, and now in the place of Clare he was returned to the monotony
of his sad home; in the full determination not to think of Clare he
crossed over to the fire where his dogs already lay sleeping, filled
his pipe and lighted it, and forthwith began to dream of nothing but
Clare as he sat gazing into the heart of the red ashes.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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