Asteroids -- Fiction; Science fiction; Short stories; Swindlers and swindling -- Fiction
Johnson didn't answer. Neither did Genius; he simply put on the table,
not a fingerbowl, but a magnifying glass. With one of his thirty
fingers he pointed politely to the bottom of the menu.
Harvey focused on the microscopic print, and his face went pasty with
rage. The minute note read: "Services and entertainment, 327 buckos 80
redsents."
"You can go to hell!" Joe growled. "We won't pay it!"
Johnson sighed ponderously. "I was afraid you'd act like that," he said
with regret. He pulled a tin badge out of his rear pocket, pinned it on
his vest, and twisted his holstered gun into view. "Afraid I'll have to
ask the sheriff to take over."
Johnson, the "sheriff," collected the money, and Johnson, the
"restaurateur," pocketed it. Meanwhile, Harvey tipped Joe the sign to
remain calm.
"My friend," he said to the mayor, and his tones took on a
schoolmasterish severity, "your long absence from Earth has perhaps
made you forget those elements of human wisdom that have entered the
folk-lore of your native planet. Such as, for example: 'It is folly
to kill a goose that lays golden eggs,' and 'Penny wise is pound
foolish.'"
"I don't get the connection," objected Johnson.
"Well, by obliging us to pay such a high price for your dinner, you put
out of your reach the chance of profiting from a really substantial
deal. My partner and I were prepared to make you a sizable offer for
the peculiar creature you call Genius. But by reducing our funds the
way you have--"
"Who said I wanted to sell him?" the mayor interrupted. He rubbed his
fingers together and asked disinterestedly: "What were you going to
offer, anyhow?"
"It doesn't matter any longer," Harvey said with elaborate
carelessness. "Perhaps you wouldn't have accepted it, anyway."
"That's right," Johnson came back emphatically. "But what would your
offer have been which I would have turned down?"
"Which one? The one we were going to make, or the one we can make now?"
"Either one. It don't make no difference. Genius is too valuable to
sell."
"Oh, come now, Mr. Johnson. Don't tell me no amount of money would
tempt you!"
"Nope. But how much did you say?"
"Ah, then you will consider releasing Genius!"
"Well, I'll tell you something," said the mayor confidentially. "When
you've got one thing, you've got one thing. But when you've got money,
it's the same as having a lot of things. Because, if you've got money,
you can buy this and that and this and that and--"
"This and that," concluded Joe. "We'll give you five hundred buckos."
"Now, gents!" Johnson remonstrated. "Why, six hundred would hardly--"
"You haven't left us much money," Harvey put in.
The mayor frowned. "All right, we'll split the difference. Make it
five-fifty."
Harvey was quick to pay out, for this was a genuine windfall. Then he
stood up and admired the astonishing possession he had so inexpensively
acquired.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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