Now, as all that Tom wanted was to be reinstated in her favor, he
took the words as the seal of the desired reconciliation, and went no
further with any confession. The words, however, meaning simply that
she loved him and wanted to love him, ought to have made Tom the more
anxious to confess all--not merely the rudeness of which he had been
guilty and which had driven her from the room, but the wrong he had
done her in spending the evening in such company; for surely it was
a grievous wrong to a pure girl like Lucy to spend the space between
the last and the next pressure of her hand in an atmosphere of vice.
But the cloud cleared from his brow, and, with a sudden reaction of
spirits, he began to be merry. To this change, however, Lucy did
not respond. The cloud seemed rather to fall more heavily over her
countenance. She turned from him, and went to a chair opposite her
grandmother. Tom followed, and sat down beside her. He was sympathetic
enough to see that things were not right between them after all. But
he referred it entirely to her uneasiness at his parents' ignorance of
their engagement.
Some of my readers may think that Lucy, too, was to blame for want of
decision; that she ought to have refused to see Thomas even once again,
till he had made his parents aware of their relation to each other.
But knowing how little sympathy and help he had from those parents,
she felt that to be severe upon him thus would be like turning him
out into a snow-storm to find his way home across a desolate moor;
and her success by persuasion would be a better thing for Thomas than
her success by compulsion. No doubt, if her rights alone had to be
considered, and not the necessities of Thomas's moral nature, the
plan she did not adopt would have been the best. But no one liveth to
himself--not even a woman whose dignity is in danger--and Lucy did
not think of herself alone. Yet, for the sake of both, she remained
perfectly firm in her purpose that Thomas should do something.
"Your uncle has said nothing about that unfortunate rencontre, Lucy,"
said Tom, hoping that what had relieved him would relieve her. "My
father came home last night, and the paternal brow is all serene."
"Then I suppose you said something about it, Tom?" said Lucy, with a
faint hope dawning in her heart.
"Oh! there's time enough for that. I've been thinking about it, you
see, and I'll soon convince you," he added, hurriedly, seeing the cloud
grow deeper on Lucy's face. "I must tell you something which I would
rather not have mentioned."
"Don't tell me, if you ought not to tell me, Tom," said Lucy, whose
conscience had grown more delicate than ever, both from the turning of
her own face toward the light, and from the growing feeling that Tom
was not to be trusted as a guide.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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