"There's no reason why I shouldn't," returned Tom. "It's only
this--that my father is vexed with me because I wouldn't make love
to your cousin Mary, and that I have let her slip out of my reach
now; for, as he says, somebody will be sure to snap her up before she
comes back. So it's just the worst time possible to tell him anything
unpleasant, you know. I really had far better wait till the poor girl
is well out to sea, and off my father's mind; for I assure you, Lucy,
it will be no joke when he does know. He's not in any mood for the news
just now, I can tell you. And then my mother's away, too, and there's
nobody to stand between me and him."
Lucy made no reply to his speech, uttered in the eagerness with which
a man, seeking to defend a bad position, sends one weak word after
another, as if the accumulation of poor arguments would make up for
the lack of a good one. She sat for a long minute looking down on a
spot in the carpet--the sight of which ever after was the signal for a
pain-throb; then, in a hopeless tone, said, with a great sigh:
"I've done all I can."
The indefiniteness of the words frightened Thomas, and he began again
to make his position good.
"I tell you what, Lucy," he said; "I give you my promise that before
another month is over--that is to give my father time to get over his
vexation--I will tell him all about it, and take the consequences."
Lucy sighed once more, and looked dissatisfied. But again it passed
through her mind that if she were to insist further, and refuse to
see Thomas until he had complied with her just desire, she would most
likely so far weaken, if not break, the bond between them, as to take
from him the only influence that might yet work on him for good, and
expose him entirely to such influences as she most feared. Therefore
she said no more. But she could not throw the weight off her, or
behave to Thomas as she had behaved hitherto. They sat silent for some
time--Thomas troubled before Lucy, Lucy troubled about Thomas. Then,
with another sigh, Lucy rose and went to the piano. She had never done
so before when Thomas was with her, for he did not care much about her
music. Now she thought of it as the only way of breaking the silence.
But what should she play?
Then came into her memory a stately, sweet song her father used to
sing. She did not know where he got either the words or the music of
it. I know that the words are from Petrarch. Probably her father had
translated them, for he had been much in Italy, and was a delicately
gifted man. But whose was the music, except it was his own, I do not
know. And as she sang the words, Lucy perceived for the first time how
much they meant, and how they belonged to her; for in singing them she
prayed both for herself and for Thomas.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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