‘Very true, Mr. Mannering; I am a plain man and do not dwell on these things, and I must needs say I have little memory for them; but I wish ye could have heard my father’s stories about the auld fights of the Mac-Dingawaies--that’s the Bertrams that now is--wi’ the Irish and wi’ the Highlanders that came here in their berlings from Ilay and Cantire; and how they went to the Holy Land--that is, to Jerusalem and Jericho, wi’ a’ their clan at their heels--they had better have gaen to Jamaica, like Sir Thomas Kittlecourt’s uncle--and how they brought hame relics like those that Catholics have, and a flag that’s up yonder in the garret. If they had been casks of muscavado and puncheons of rum it would have been better for the estate at this day; but there’s little comparison between the auld keep at Kittlecourt and the castle o’ Ellangowan; I doubt if the keep’s forty feet of front. But ye make no breakfast, Mr. Mannering; ye’re no eating your meat; allow me to recommend some of the kipper. It was John Hay that catcht it, Saturday was three weeks, down at the stream below Hempseed ford,’ etc. etc. etc. The Laird, whose indignation had for some time kept him pretty steady to one topic, now launched forth into his usual roving style of conversation, which gave Mannering ample time to reflect upon the disadvantages attending the situation which an hour before he had thought worthy of so much envy. Here was a country gentleman, whose most estimable quality seemed his perfect good-nature, secretly fretting himself and murmuring against others for causes which, compared with any real evil in life, must weigh like dust in the balance. But such is the equal distribution of Providence. To those who lie out of the road of great afflictions are assigned petty vexations which answer all the purpose of disturbing their serenity; and every reader must have observed that neither natural apathy nor acquired philosophy can render country gentlemen insensible to the grievances which occur at elections, quarter-sessions, and meetings of trustees. Curious to investigate the manners of the country, Mannering took the advantage of a pause in good Mr. Bertram’s string of stories to inquire what Captain Hatteraick so earnestly wanted with the gipsy woman. ‘O, to bless his ship, I suppose. You must know, Mr. Mannering, that these free-traders, whom the law calls smugglers, having no religion, make it all up in superstition; and they have as many spells and charms and nonsense--’ ‘Vanity and waur!’ said the Dominie;’ it is a trafficking with the Evil One. Spells, periapts, and charms are of his device--choice arrows out of Apollyon’s quiver.’