Advertising -- Fiction; Bank employees -- Fiction; Labor unions -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Satire
They saw haggard faces, sunken-eyed, pale-lipped men and women and
children. They saw trembling hands that fidgeted with knives and forks
that were obviously unnecessary. They saw women at the tables trying to
still whining children. They saw gray-haired heads fallen on soup-plates
utterly exhausted from inanition.
They saw starving and penniless human beings by the thousand.
And the spectators, hosts of these guests, ran over the faces and the
forms of the men and women and children--all alike in that all were
hungry and all were penniless. And the same thought struck them all, and
they expressed it audibly, with gusto, as though they were original
thinkers, with the modesty of professional epigrammatists. All the
spectators said:
"Say, it will be great to see them eat!"
New York's great big heart had spoken in no uncertain accents!
"And the greatest of these is charity."
XXIV
Just after the applause that greeted Grace Goodchild's arrival had begun
to subside, and the public was about to demand that the feast, for which
they had paid, begin a bugle blew.
H. R., who was Fame since he was initials, entered the arena.
Instantly the well-trained Public Sentiment Corps began to shout,
angrily:
"_Sit_ down! _Sit down!_"
That, as intended by H. R., made all rise to their feet.
Then, and only then, did H. R. advance into the arena, followed by the
Mayor of the City of New York, the Bishop of the Diocese of the same,
and the other dignitaries.
The applause that came from the members of the Society of American
Sandwich Artists was not applause. It was fervor, frenzy, fury. They
yelled and shouted with the enthusiastic recklessness of free men who
knew that after their throats went dry ten beers, also free, would cure.
The audience, seeing and hearing their fellow-men applaud, felt
themselves left out of something. They were free men. They therefore
also applauded, even more frenziedly.
No beers; not even knowledge; merely insistence upon political
equality!
In front of the Goodchild box H. R., whose progress resembled Buffalo
Bill's minus the curls, paused. He looked intently at Grace Goodchild.
She knew something was expected of her--something spectacular,
thrilling, befitting the imperial consort. She stared back at H. R.
agonizedly. Couldn't he prompt her? What was she to do, and how and
when?
"Grace! Grace! Grace!" shouted the free sandwiches.
Instantly as well as instinctively the other ninety-nine beautiful
perfections rose in their boxes and waved their handkerchiefs.
The crowd, drawn thither by one of the noblest charities of the age,
went wild. Grace was rich! She was theirs! They cheered what belonged to
them!
Grace Goodchild, actually urged by her aristocratic friends, rose and
bowed to H. R. with a queenly air.
H. R. bowed low to her and walked on.
When he reached the stage all the bands began to play the national
anthem almost together.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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