Boarding school students -- Fiction; College students -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Love stories
With that instinctive shrinking from publicity which marks the
professions of literature, art, and the drama, each of the compartments
of the third-class coach bore a label, printed in three colours,
announcing that this accommodation was reserved for Mr. Wilton Spurge’s
Number One Company--I have always desired to meet a Number Two Company,
but have never succeeded--in "The Sign of the Cross," proceeding from
Cambridge to Liverpool Street, for Walthamstow.
The majority of Mr. Wilton Spurge’s followers took their seats at once;
but three young ladies, hugging boxes of chocolate, remained in
affectionate conversation with the undergraduates upon the platform.
Most of the gentlemen of the company still lingered in the
refreshment-room. Suddenly there was a gentle tremor throughout the
train, as the engine and brake-van reluctantly backed themselves into a
position of contact. A whistle blew, and a white flag fluttered far down
the platform.
"There’s no hurry," observed The Freak, who had returned from the ticket
office and was now surveying the passing show with his head thrust out
of the window under my arm. "That white flag only means that the
Westinghouse brake is working all right."
But the female mind takes no account of technical trifles, least of all
upon a railway journey. To a woman flags and whistles all spell panic.
At the first blast, a lady (whom I took to be the Empress Poppeia)
hastily shepherded every one within reach into the train, and then
directed a piercing summons in the direction of the refreshment-room.
She was seconded by an irregular but impressive chorus of admonition
upon the perils of delay, led by Mercia in person and supported by a
bevy of Christian Martyrs and Roman Dancing-Girls.
The whistle sounded again, and a second flag fluttered--a green one this
time. There was a concerted shriek from the locomotive and the ladies,
followed by a commotion at the door of the refreshment-room, from which
eftsoons the Emperor Nero, bearing a bag of buns and a copy of "The
Era," shot hastily forth. He was closely followed by Marcus Superbus,
running rapidly and carrying two bottles of stout. Three Roman
Patricians with their mouths full, together with a Father of the Early
Church clinging to a half-consumed pork-pie, brought up the rear.
Deeply interested in the progress of the race, and speculating eagerly
as to whether Pagan or Christian would secure the corner-seats, The
Freak and I failed for the moment to note that our own compartment was
in danger of invasion. But resistance was vain. At the very last moment
the door was wrenched open by the guard, and four human beings were
projected into our company just as the train began to move. A handbag
and two paper parcels hurtled through the air after them.
"Sorry to hurry you, Mr. Welwyn, sir," said the guard, standing on the
footboard and addressing the leader of the party through the window,
"but we are behind time as it is, with that theatrical lot."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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