_Note, which I suggest to the Professor._ Should this ever meet the eye of Baron Rothschild, let him remember, that by his single act, he can attain to the happiness of eighty people. "If any of you, here present, happen to be acquainted with the Baron, and will introduce me to him, it will be, I am sure, a step in the interests of humanity generally, and not without its beneficial results to individuals particularly." ("Hear! hear!") . . . . . . . With this bit of Practicality the lecture concludes. He tells me, in confidence, that he finished quickly because he felt he was "above his audience." Milburd subsequently offers to introduce the Professor to Baron Rothschild "for a consideration." * * * No one, as yet has found any of the pleasures of Poverty. Some one says "Absence of Income-tax." This is met with Absence of Income. Solution rejected. * * * We found afterwards on our Scientific Lecturer's table MSS. of _"Letters to Rothschild" by a Professor of Scientific Economy._ One commences thus:-- Dear Baron, You will doubtless be surprised at hearing from an humble individual who has nothing but his Scheme of Personal Scientific Economy, and his unblemished character, to recommend him to your notice. I am getting up a subscription for myself. This sounds, put shortly, egotistical. On the contrary, it is Cosmopolitanly Philanthropical. If I am enabled to teach my doctrines for nothing, I shall, then, be slave to no man, no, not even to myself, as represented by my own necessities. May I head the list with a sum worthy your munificence and perfectly Oriental wealth? Yes. I hear you say 'yes.' I knew it. I shall put your Lordship down for £20,000, and will be careful to send you a receipt for the money. Business is business. Yrs., &c. J. SOAMES. * * * Perhaps one day the Professor of Scientific Economy will publish his "_Letters to Baron Rothschild_." But I don't think there will ever appear a very voluminous collection of "_Letters of Baron R. to Mr. Jenkyns Soames_." ----- Milburd asks him "what he should say were the pleasures of poverty." The Professor considers. We all consider. The Professor wishing to do everything methodically, writes on the slate in large type THE PLEASURES OF POVERTY. FIRST Pleasure ...... . . . . . . . . . Then he pauses. Then he speaks. "On thorough consideration, I am convinced that Poverty has no pleasures. "If any, they are peculiar. "They are Grim Pleasures. "One grim Pleasure of Poverty is talking about ourselves." "A very poor subject," observes Miss Medford.