England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
“Ah, Maurice,” said I, forgetting for a moment the personage who sat
before me, and thinking of Dr. Harley’s death-bed, and the fatherless
children there so helpless and dependent on other people’s judgment,
“your father was a good man, but he had not the heart to live after he
lost his fortune, and your mother is a good woman, but she had not the
heart to bring you up poorly and bravely in your own home. They are my
dear friends, and I dare speak of them even to you. Why did she send you
to that idle uncle of yours, to be brought up in idleness?--you big,
strong, indolent man! What is the good of you, though you are Fellow of
Exeter? You might have been of some use in the world by this time if you
had lived among your brothers and sisters, a widow’s son.”
Maurice started--rose up--made a surprised exclamation of my name--and
then dropped into his chair again without saying anything. He did not
answer me a word. The offence melted out of his face, but he kept his
eyes down and did not look at me. I could not tell whether he was
angry--I had been moved by my own feelings beyond, for the moment,
thinking of his.
“Ask your friend to come and see you here,” I said, after an awkward
little pause; “say, Mr. Crofton and I will be glad if he will dine with
us before you go--perhaps, to-morrow, Maurice, and that will leave him
time to get home on Saturday--and we will think about it, should the
living of Estcourt fall vacant. Forgive me,” I continued, as I rose to
go away, “I said more than I ought to have said.”
He took my hand and wrung it with an emphatic pressure; what he said I
made out only with difficulty, I think it was, “No more than is true.”
And I left him with somewhat uncomfortable feelings. I had not the very
least right to lecture this young man; quite the other way--for was not
I a woman and an illiterate person, and he Fellow of his College? I
confess I did not feel very self-complacent as I left the room. This
third confidential interview, in which I had over-passed the prudent
limits of friendliness, did not _feel_ at all satisfactory.
Nevertheless, I was glad to see that Maurice was magnanimous--that he
was likely to forgive me--and that possibly there were elements of
better things even in his regarding indolence. All which symptoms,
though in a moral point of view highly gratifying, made me but feel the
more strongly that I had gone beyond due limits, and exceeded the margin
of truth-telling and disagreeableness which one is _not_ allowed towards
one’s guests, and in one’s own house.
CHAPTER XIII.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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