England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
“Poor Nugent!” said Maurice--“poor honest fellow!--he was not very
brilliant, but people liked him all the better for that. What a bright
frank face he had--what a laugh! I shall never hear anybody laugh so
heartily again. And to think of a fellow like that, and hundreds more,
sacrificed to these black demons! Good heavens! and we sitting here at
home idling away our lives!”
“Ah, my Bertie!” cried I, out of my heart, “and no one left behind him
to bear his name--nobody to mourn for him except ourselves--nobody
belonging to _him_! If there is one thing a man has a right to in life
and death, it is surely a woman’s tears.”
I did not think what I was saying. The words were scarcely out of my
lips when an overpowering burst of tears broke through all the painful
reserve and forced calmness of Alice. She covered her face with her
hands, hid her head, drew her veil frantically over her passionate
weeping. But the flood would have its way, and she could not stop it. I
dried my own tears to look on almost with awe at that outburst of
controlled and restrained nature. My poor Bertie! the last sad right of
a man had fallen to him unawares; he had that mournful possession, all
to himself, poured forth upon the grave of his youth with a fulness that
knew no reserve--a woman’s tears!
Maurice stood by overwhelmed with surprise; he looked at his sister--he
grew crimson up to his hair--he drew back a step as if he felt himself
an intruder spying upon this unsuspected grief. Then he retired to the
bookcase at the other side of the room, with an appealing glance at me.
I followed him softly, Alice being far too entirely absorbed to observe
us for the moment.
“What does it mean--was there anything between them?” asked Maurice, in
my ear.
“They were playfellows and dear friends,” said I; “you know how Clara
feels it too.”
“Not like _that_,” said Maurice, once more growing red, as he turned to
the books in the shelves--he stood there absorbed in these books, taking
out some to examine them, showing himself entirely occupied with this
investigation till Alice had recovered her composure. She looked up at
me with a guilty, pale face when she had wept out her tears; and I was
comforted that she saw her brother coldly standing in the background
with his back to us and a book in his hand. I had never been so pleased
with Maurice before.
“You are not well, my dear child,” said I, “I will bring you some wine,
and you must rest a little. Thank you for remembering him, Alice. Now we
can give him nothing but tears.”
Alice, all pale, miserable, and abashed, gasped forth something of which
I could only distinguish the words “playfellow” and “old friend.”
“I was saying so--you were like his sisters, Clara and you,” said I, out
loud to reach Maurice’s ear.
Alice looked up in my face, now that she had betrayed herself. I thought
she was almost jealous that I did not understand her--that I really
believed these were, like Clara’s, friendly and sisterly tears.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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