soul! Surely she loved him yet with her mother-love, else how could she
have been angry enough with him to strike him! For weeks the pain
lasted keen, and it was ever after ready to return. It was a human type
of the divine suffering in the discipline of the sinner, which with
some of the old prophets takes the shape of God’s repenting of the
evils he has brought on his people; and was the only trouble she ever
kept from her mother: she feared to wake her own pain in the dearer
heart. She could have told her father; for, although he was, she knew,
just as loving as her mother, he was not so soft-hearted, and would
not, she thought, distress himself too much about an ache more or less
in a heart that had done its duty; but as she could not tell her
mother, she would not tell her father. But her father and mother saw
that a change had passed upon her, and partially, if not quite,
understood the nature of it. They perceived that she left behind her on
that night a measure of her gaiety, that thereafter she was yet gentler
to her parents, and if possible yet tenderer to her brother.
For all the superiority constantly manifested by her in her relations
with Francis, the feeling was never absent from her that he was of a
race above her own; and now the visage of the young officer in her
father’s old regiment never, any more than that of her play-fellow,
rose in her mind’s eye uncrossed by the livid mark of her whip from the
temple down the cheek! Whether she had actually seen it so, she did not
certainly remember, but so it always came to her, and the face of the
man never cost her a tear; it was only that of the boy that made her
weep.
Another thing distressed her even more: the instant ere she struck the
first, the worst blow, she saw on his face an expression so meanly
selfish that she felt as if she hated him. That expression had vanished
from her visual memory, her whip had wiped it away, but she knew that
for a moment she had all but hated him--if it was indeed _all but_!
All the house was careful the next morning that Phemy should not be
disturbed; and when at length the poor child appeared, looking as if
her colour was not ‘ingrain,’ and so had been washed out by her tears,
Kirsty made haste to get her a nice breakfast, and would answer none of
her questions until she had made a proper meal.
‘Noo, Kirsty,’ said Phemy at last, ‘ye maun tell me what he said whan
ye loot him ken ’at I cudna win til him ’cause ye wudna lat me!’
‘He saidna muckle to that. I dinna think he had been sair missin ye.’
‘I see ye’re no gaein to tell me the trowth, Kirsty! I ken by mysel he
maun hae been missin me dreidfu’!’
‘Ye can jeedge nae man by yersel, Phemy. Men’s no like hiz lass-fowk!’
Phemy laughed superior.
‘What ken ye aboot men, Kirsty? There never cam a man near ye, i’ the
w’y o’ makin up til ye!’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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