This morning, however, she was not tormented with a string of
questions. Northcote was silent, gloomy, and haggard; something
appeared to be preying on his mind. The remorse he had shown for having
failed to ask how her grandchild was seemed strange to her indeed, for
until the previous day he had always stood in her mind as a member of
the inaccessible classes. Something had appeared to happen to him by
which, in a few short hours, the tenor and current of his life had
been changed. There was a terrible excitement burning now under his
pale skin; his eyes were restless, his fingers were twitching, and he
drank cup after cup of the hot tea as though he were consumed with an
intolerable thirst.
When he had finished his breakfast he took his wig and gown out of a
cupboard, and placed them together with his brief in a small black
bag. He was on the point of starting for the court, when through the
open door he could hear footsteps on the stairs. Some one was coming
up to the fourth story, an incident so rare in the experience of its
occupant as always to be rendered memorable. In an instant the jovial
outline of the solicitor presented itself to his imagination. With
an agitation that was indescribable he foresaw that he was not to be
allowed to take the brief into court after all.
Instead of Mr. Whitcomb, however, his visitor proved to be a boy with a
telegram. He tore it out of its envelope. The contents were contained
in three words: “Life, my son.” They were from his mother.
With this omen in his heart he set forth. A welcome change had taken
place in the weather. The air had become sharp and dry; already misty
beams were stealing out from the December sun. The press in the streets
was immense, but he brushed through it with the elevating consciousness
that he was overcoming a real obstacle. In his every fibre was the
breath of contest, the joy of battle. His mother’s words, the faint
beams of the new day, the rattle of the traffic, all conspired to endow
him with a ruthless determination.
If it was to be that defeat and confusion should overtake him, at
least he would not go out to greet them half-way. Once and for all
he had put off those fears and misgivings that had tormented him. A
great commander storming an inaccessible position does not pause to
estimate the cost; he does not pause to contemplate the inevitability
of disaster. He, too, would show himself of this quality: a great
commander of his lurid and revolted imagination in the teeth of
frightful odds.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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